A World Worth Protecting Chapter 1457: It’s finally an illusion.

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Where am I lying?

Why is it dark all around...

Vaguely, I seem to hear someone talking, but I can't hear what the other person is saying clearly.

I'm a little tired, forget it, don't listen to it, I think I should be gone, but before I disappear, I always have to think about my life.

My whole life... is actually quite interesting.

I never knew who I was.

So, naturally, I don't know what my name is.

Perhaps, I don't have a name.

It’s strange, how can there be people without names? In my cognition, it seems that everyone in this world has their own name.

Unfortunately, I didn't.

I can't remember why this happened. It just has a little vague memory. It seems... Some day long ago, I gave my name to someone else.

Willingly.

I feel so stupid, how can I give away my name willingly...

I don't know, maybe there is a reason.

Alas, my thoughts seem to be a little confused, let me stroke it... It is true that these things always echo in my thoughts, which seem to be very important, but I can't think of it, just can't think of it, there is no way.

All I can think of is my childhood.

My childhood, I define it as my life before the age of twenty. In this ordinary world, like other children, I have experienced school, experienced play, and experienced time and time again seemingly naive game.

But people around me always seem to tell me to study hard, to do this, to do that... I was a little bored at first, until one day, when I watched the rain falling in the sky, I suddenly wondered why It's raining, what's the rain?

My teacher gave me the answer to this question. Perhaps from that day on, I am full of curiosity about the world and everything. I like to ask why and get answers. That will make me very satisfy.

For this satisfaction, I began to study earnestly and study earnestly. It seems that there is a desire to promote me and let me acquire all the unknown things.

Every time I gain new knowledge, and every time I unlock a why, I will be very happy, very happy, I feel that I seem to be a lot different.

Perhaps because it is too ordinary, so I am more obsessed with this kind of difference that I think, so I study harder and master all the knowledge I can master.

This kind of life lasted until I was twenty years old. At that time, I always wanted to show it, whether it was in front of a friend, in front of a teacher, or in front of the opposite sex.

I always seem to want to show my own difference. Even deep in my heart, I always feel that I am different from others.

Although...I don't have a distinguished appearance, I don't have a rich family, just a very ordinary existence among all living beings, but this doesn't affect my heart, there is a bird living in it.

This little bird, flying in the sky, free and easy, is my sustenance and the wings that make me feel unique.

In the final analysis, I was a bit polarized at that time. The leap of thought and the ordinaryness of reality made me like to be silent many times.

It was also at that time that I met a girl who was a classmate in my next class, and was also the first secret love in my life.

Secret love is happy, secret love is also bitter.

But I am willing.

Because, it makes me more like to express myself, all the time... I still remember that time, it seemed that expressing myself was an instinct in my life. I even longed to be a hero and the darling of this world. Longing for herself to be noticed by everyone, and thus also attract her attention.

So, every time I gave a speech, I was very hardworking and obsessed, until this crush ended.

It ended without a disease, and the other party didn't know it in the end, I was in crush on her.

The day I graduated, I was very sad and I had the courage, but in the end... I lowered my head silently, maybe this is a curse, and in the later studies in the higher palace, I will still do it again. Crush.

During this period, I also fell in love with fortune-telling. Every time I was unhappy, I would find a fortune-teller, sit in front of him, and take out a little money.

There is a little trick here, that is, you can’t give it first, and then you can get countless praises, countless praises, countless good deeds and other words, which will make me particularly happy, and thus After the end, give your pocket money to the fortune-teller.

This kind of life lasted for a few years. Before graduation, I received the first love letter in my life. I was very happy, but I didn't like that girl.

Until I graduated, I had my own job, and my impulse for self-expression seemed to have reached its limit at this time, so I worked hard, performed hard, and tried to gain recognition.

That period of life, recalling now, is also quite interesting, because in my hard work, I met a girl, and we fell in love.

Love is a cup of bitter coffee.

Although it is bitter, it is also sweet, but at the end of the drink...It seems that it is not clear whether it is more bitter or sweeter.

My first love is over.

It was also at that time, I learned the cigarettes in this world, and I was also attracted by the wines of this world. Since then, cigarettes and wine have become a part of my life.

I'm still working hard, but the impulse in my heart seems to have faded a lot with the years. It is also at this time that, for some reason, the opposite **** around me has increased. .

second time's love, three times's love, fourth time's love, a cup of bitter coffee, seem to be connected together, let me drink again and again, until one day, I met a woman, a tall man, Crescent eyes with a smile made me feel very comfortable.

I thought, maybe this is my last cup of coffee in my life.

We love each other and we get married.

At that time, I felt that at a glance I could see how I looked when I was old, very relaxed, comfortable, and beautiful...

Until a few years later, the mirror was broken, and the marriage came to an end at this time.

Can't tell who is right and who is wrong, and who blames whom.

Pain, struggle, gritted teeth, metamorphosis... became the main theme of my time. The little bird in my heart also flew higher at this time, touched the sun and gained sunshine.

Maybe destiny likes to joke with people. Later in my life, many opposite sexes appeared in my world. Some of them are tall, some are graceful, some are gentle, some are overbearing... all beautiful, all excellent , They came in groups, and left in groups, and at the same time they went round and round, they also made me a little confused.

Because in the end... what I picked up was a cup of bitter coffee, like smoke and wine.

Smoke hurts the lungs.

Alcohol hurts the liver.

The opposite sex... sad.

But I still like cigarettes, I still like alcohol, and I still have a longing for love...

Until, when I was forty years old, I suddenly realized that compared to the opposite sex, I actually prefer to chat with friends, talk about the past, and point to the future.

Whenever I drink, I like to drag my friends, brag, laugh and tease together, like a teenager together.

Perhaps it is this change that has made my friends more and more. I listen to their stories, they also listen to my stories, we talk freely, and we tell them.

There may be some precautions, and perhaps some secrets, but it doesn’t matter, happiness is the most important thing.

At that time, I knew that everyone is a book, everyone has a story, everyone...in fact, from the bottom of their hearts, they are all alone.

And the more I know, the less lonely I seem to be.

Among my friends, there are men and women, old and young, and all kinds of things exist, but it doesn’t matter. A sincere smile is the power to break everything.

Gradually, more and more friends like to talk to me.

Gradually, my smile became brighter.

Gradually, I seem to have found a way to make myself happy.

Let me tell you that during that period of my life, surpass learned knowledge, surpass performance, surpass love, and became the most important part of me.

This is a kind of sharing, maybe it's the inner squeeze to a certain extent, the water is overflowing, not only I need it, but many people... all need it.

In this sharing and narration, I have gone through year after year. I don’t know when I don’t like to narrate anymore. I started to pursue comfort. This comfort includes spirit and material. .

I think it's when my hair started to turn white.

I am no longer limited to what to do, no longer limited to what I think, everything that makes me feel comfortable, I will think about it, I will finish it, I start to like to see the blue sky, I start to like to see the white clouds, and I start to like Watch the sunrise, but I don’t like sunset.

But I also like the starry sky in the dark night.

I like to sit in a rocking chair, have a drink, take a book at will, read it, enjoy the air, enjoy the time, and enjoy everything.

I no longer stay up late, I started to get up early.

I am no longer obsessed with the why of everything, because I have many answers.

I don't want to show anymore, because I see it too thoroughly.

I no longer talk about it constantly, because that would be annoying.

I don't think about the opposite **** any more, because looking at them, I just smiled. in the eye may have some memories, but the figures in the memories may not be clear to me.

The only thing I pursue is to make myself a little more comfortable and feel more stable. It seems that everything in this world has become better in my eyes.

This kind of life lasted for a long time...Until one day, I touched my face and felt a lot of wrinkles. I looked at my hands and saw a lot of wrinkles and patches.

My eyes have also darkened a bit, and everything around me has also become blurred, but looking at me in the mirror, I am still working hard to straighten my body, and my smile is still beautiful.

It's just...outside the mirror, I know, I'm scared.

I became very timid, I became very cautious.

I know what I am afraid of, because sometimes after waking up at night, I seem to be able to see the figure transformed by the breath of death, looking at me silently outside the window.

It seems that they are calling me, waiting for me.

I don't want to follow them.

Even among them, some of them are old friends of mine.

I don't want to see them, I am scared.

I don't want to die, I want to live, stay alive... This urge to survive makes me sometimes feel uncomfortable breathing.

At this time, I will pay attention to those old friends who are still there, and tell them to pay attention to their bodies and to care about their health, because...I don't want to see them go away.

It makes me more breathless and more afraid of death.

People, why should there be death?

I often think about this question, and I am also thinking about what I am afraid of, is it really afraid of death...

The answer is yes.

But behind this affirmative answer, I have another answer.

I am afraid of being alone.

I'm leaving, I will be alone.

I will be alone when they are gone.

This fear of death and fear of loneliness turned into a force, which seems to fill my whole body to support my existence, but... my body seems to be riddled with holes, this force After it emerged, it followed the sores and dissipated at a speed visible to my naked eyes.

I want to keep them, but I can't.

It seems that I don't even have the strength to get up. I feel the breath of death has filled me. My desire, everything about me, seems to be disappearing.

At that moment, I suddenly understood a truth.

Fear, it's useless.

That day, I remember, I seemed to have strength again, so I sat up hard, dressed myself neatly, walked to the yard, to my rocking chair, and finally I sat on the rocking chair and looked into the distance Sunset.

Autumn breeze was blowing, and it was icy, causing the branches in the yard to shake slightly.

On that branch, in this season, only a yellowed leaf remained, curled up, insisting that it did not fall.

I looked at the sunset and the only leaf on the branch. Suddenly I felt that everything was very beautiful. Gradually...I smiled.

In this smile...I saw the setting sun set, I saw the moment when the dusk passed, the only leaf on the branch fell.

Floating and floating... just like my rocking chair.

Until, it floated in front of my eyes, covered my eyes, covered all the light, and brought this world to an end in my eyes.

But my consciousness does not seem to dissipate.

There is darkness all around me, I don’t know where I am, maybe I’m still on the rocking chair...

It is precisely because my consciousness is still there that...that's why I have this memory of my own life.

I think my life may not be wonderful for others, but for me, this is my only one.

At this time, I seem to have heard the call again, I heard the voice...

It seems that someone is calling me to wake me up...

But I can't hear clearly, I can only recognize it by my feelings, and that voice is a bit familiar, as if I had heard it in a time before.

"What is he talking about..."

"Speak louder, I can't hear." I spoke hard into the darkness, perhaps my hard work, and it worked. Gradually, when my consciousness was about to blur, my voice became clearer.

"Hope...you can live forever and be free."

My thoughts shook suddenly!

"Hope...you can live forever, happy and happy."

There is a huge wave in my consciousness! !

"Hope...you can live forever and never forget your original intention."

rumbled is coming from my heart! ! !

"Hope...you can live forever and be happy and beautiful."

My soul shakes the star ring! ! ! !

"Finally, the name Wang Baole, I'll give you back." The moment a familiar voice entered my ears...the body floating in the starry sky, its eyes...suddenly opened! ! !

"My name is...Wang Baole!"

The final article

Thick Saturn ring.

In the starry sky, Wang Baole stood silently in the awakened place, in the eye stared at the distance with thick complexity, for a long time... He raised his hand and touched his eyebrows.

After a long while, Wang Baole sighed slightly, as if he had known it a long time ago, put his right hand down and grabbed it far away. A bead and a wine gourd appeared in front of him.

Looking at the beads, Wang Baole was silent for a long time, lifted his left hand, and gently held it.

The size of the bead is exactly three inches from the palm of the palm. It is his all and his world.

Finally, he picked up the hip flask with his right hand, put it to his mouth, and took a big swig...bitterly shook his head, and silently walked to the distance sea of stars.

His back, lonely and bleak, the farther he goes, the farther he goes.

"This lonely road, let's go on..."

It's finally an illusion.

Who is the gift and who is the robbery...

End of the book