Restricted Doomsday Syndrome Chapter 1027: Toss around

The tablemate was right at the meeting, and suddenly he raised his eyes, over my shoulder, and looked behind me.

I felt a sign and turned around abruptly, but saw nothing.

"What are you looking at?" I couldn't help asking the former tablemate.

"Oh, a girl from the class next door, she has been watching you firmly just now." At this point, my former deskmate said in a ridiculous tone: "Actually, I always think, are you secretly crushed by her? Up."

I took it as a joke, but I also doubted in my heart whether the girl I used to talk to at the table was Sakiya. Just now, my intuition has become extremely sharp, and this world that feels extremely real, its balance of truth, has begun to tilt. When treating the doomsday illusion as a "delusion", I felt very uncomfortable in my heart, like being taken away from important things, and when the doomsday illusion became real again, I was a little scared, afraid of this. The real and ordinary world will once again fall into the doomsday filled with weirdness and mystery. The "Jiang", which could not be felt just a few hours ago, once again showed signs of hallucinations, and my previous conversation with Bajing was like a key to make this normal and real world. Towards the key to destroy fate.

Although there is no definite evidence yet, my instinct is telling me that "Jiang", who was once excluded from this world, is eroding away. Everything I saw, heard, and felt, including the wind and grass, and the shadows under the night, gradually gave birth to a strange smell. I'm not afraid of weirdness, just. From the bottom of my heart, I don't want this world to fall. However, if I tell other people this concern. It must be regarded as a mental illness. Although in my eyes, the world is becoming unknown, the signs of weirdness, mystery and doomsday are not strong, in other words, probably It's just a coincidence in my conversation based on the eight sceneries. A spontaneous illusion...I hope that this is the case, and everything I worry about is nothing but my illusion.

If the doomsday illusion is just my unwillingness to be ordinary "delusions", those adventures are nothing more than brain-filled images, and I confuse it with the true reality simply because I am too invested-if this is the truth. I am also willing to accept it, precisely because the feeling that "the world is heading towards a destiny that only I know" is too sudden and strong. Therefore, I feel more and more that the real and ordinary world outlook before is so strong. good.

However. What I worry about is that all of this is not my delusion. The "doomsday fantasy" does exist, and this world will also follow in the footsteps of the apocalyptic fantasy. This result, even if it allows me to escape the trap of the repeater. There is nothing to be happy about. Because, with great difficulty, I can see Bajing and them, and they can live peacefully in such a beautiful world. For me, such a scene is simply a dream that I don't want to wake up.

I passed the next class along the corridor, Sakuya was not there, is she the girl who had been staring at me at the same table before? I was a little concerned, but when I turned my head immediately, she was no longer there, which also made me a little concerned. She walked so fast. I poked my head out of the handrail in the corridor and walked around along the stairs, trying to find the familiar figure. Sakuya is here. She is a good student who has never been absent for self-study at night. Since she is not in the class or in the hallway, the most likely possibility is to go downstairs and go out.

However, until the evening self-study bell rang in the second half, I could not find that figure. I couldn't help but feel a little worried, where did Sakiya go? Did something happen? I felt a little nervous about the abnormal feeling that I had after talking with Bajing. With a gloomy mood, I returned to my seat and Ba Jing looked over, but didn't seem to intend to continue the previous topic at this time. Her gaze passed over my face as if nothing had happened. , Once again fell on the exercises.

After the evening self-study time, after I solved the exercises as quickly as possible, I have been analyzing every detail I felt and perceived. In the eyes of others, this world should be accustomed to normal, but for me, when I have both the experience of this world and the doomsday illusion, when I compare the two, I feel that it is only one step away from the "abnormal", but However, such considerations can only be deeply buried in my heart. Even if the Eight Sceneries of Whisperers are formed, I would not think my thoughts are normal.

The basic structure of this world is similar to the doomsday illusion, but it is far from the reality of the hospital. If you observe the doomsday illusion based on the reality of the hospital, the doomsday illusion is a lower-level world. However, if you use this world as the base point to observe the reality of the hospital and the doomsday illusion, it will produce a conclusion that "both are delusions in the brain".

This world is the ultimate reality. Using this world as a blueprint, I imagined the illusion of apocalypse in my mind, and filled the whole story skeleton with the reality of the hospital—this idea is also based on existence.

If you look at the reality of the hospital and the world from the perspective of the doomsday illusion, you can feel that the doomsday illusion is in a central position among the three.

I have never been able to confirm which one is the only and real world, precisely because if one of the three is completely false, there will be cracks in the existence of the other two.

Although the situation is becoming more and more complicated, this is just a disorder of the world view, not my purpose. I have always felt that it is necessary to confirm my relationship with the world through the people in my memory, and I have an urgent premonition that I must complete and confirm this before becoming "more and more strange" The appearance of the world is to perfect a consolidated worldview. Whether it is a "doomsday illusion delusion" or a "trap of a repeater", I must confirm it before the eerie changes I feel are completed, otherwise the situation may intensify.

After making a decision, I rushed out of the classroom when the bell rang for the end of class and waited for Sakiya's appearance in an ambush outside the school gate.

When Sakiya walked out of the school gate, I recognized her at a glance. Like the Eight Views, regardless of appearance. She was still wearing a school uniform for girls, which was more familiar and nostalgic than the broken personality I saw in reality in the hospital. I am not very familiar with Sakuya’s campus life. When I met her in the doomsday illusion, the abnormalities brought about by the Doomsday Truth Sect had completely eroded her life in just a few days. Things took a turn for the worse. In the doomsday illusion, Sakiya mentioned that she had already impressed me a long time ago, but at the beginning, it was just a chance encounter that I had overlooked. However, in this it looks like a doomsday illusion. But there is no weird and mysterious world. Are there such intersections between us? Can my knowledge of her in the doomsday illusion be applied to this world? The answer to this question is before seeing the Eight Views. It has always been negative.

My in-depth relationship with these people in the doomsday illusion has surpassed my current time in this world. If the relationship and acquaintance between me and them have not changed, then perhaps the "doomsday "Illusion" is seen as a premonition of the future. And this kind of premonition is originally a "mysterious" category.

In other words. Only when I am "independent" with them, when I approach them on the initiative, there is no intersection like apocalyptic illusion, that can make me feel that this world is safe and the doomsday will not begin. Therefore, when I looked at Sakuya, I expected in my heart, "The Doomsday Fantasy" is nothing but my delusion, and the one I recognize in the Doomsday Fantasy is nothing but my delusion, although the relationship between us, Great changes may happen, but if the acquaintance between us is based on a doomsday doom, then I would rather look at her from a distance.

I have always dreamed that the intersection between people must not be based on the beginning of a nightmare destiny, that is the truly beautiful world I want.

Sakiya's complexion is very good, not at all the panic and helpless look that I had when I met her in the doomsday illusion. Obviously, she has more friends than in the doomsday illusion. When talking to friends, she always smiles quietly, without any cowardice, just as I have imagined, if she had not encountered the weird and mysterious time of everyone Look like. When I saw her like this, my eyes moistened. I don’t think I need to meet her deliberately. I don’t know what the future will be if I step into her life, but now the world feels too ambiguous for me, and I worry about it. The intersection of night will be the same as when the eight sceneries intersect, letting weirdness and mystery appear in this world. Assuming that this world is a "trap of repeaters", the changes that have taken place before are probably that "Jiang" is eroding the world. This is not a bad thing, but when I think of it happening, it makes me feel that it is not true. A good thing.

At least, I hope that this world, the women in this world, can continue this plain but real life, even if this may be just based on my consciousness, it doesn't matter if a dream is born in order to trap me.

Hachijing is already pursuing satisfaction beyond happiness, and Sakiya's appearance is enough to make me understand her happiness at this time. They don't need me and can have their own happiness. To be able to see them like this is also a kind of happiness to me.

I looked at them from a distance, Sakiya suddenly stopped and looked around, maybe for another reason, but I felt that she was looking for me, and she sensed my existence—such a keen feeling, right For an ambiguous world, it’s not a good thing-so I left, just like instinct, I walked into the shadow of the alleyway and walked quickly, although I had to avoid Sakuya, I probably had to alienate the eight sceneries. However, my heart at this time is full of happiness. If possible, I would like to see other people to confirm whether the lives of Mae, Marceau, Seiro, and Dorothy are as peaceful and happy as Hakkei and Sakiya. If they are the same, then I I feel that there is nothing wrong with accepting that I am a patient with secondary disease and treating the doomsday illusion as my own delusion.

Because, I actually no longer know what is real, where is reality, and where is fantasy. In my experience, the first moment is still the real thing, and the next moment becomes the illusory change. It is too frequent. The only thing that penetrates the reality or the illusion is the personality, spirit and consciousness. So, I can’t help thinking, maybe, what is real and what is illusion, in fact, is not important, what is important is that in this reality or illusion, each person’s own thoughts. This is also the time when the clear and distinct gap between reality and illusion no longer exists. The inevitable result.

The true power of "viruses" may not lie in making people sick. Instead, it blurs the line between the patient’s reality and the illusion. People's way of life and inherent concepts make them have to distinguish between illusion and reality, but it can run through in a wonderful state. For patients, the basis of their own existence has been completely changed when the definition becomes blurred. When it is no longer possible to distinguish between illusion and reality as in the past, the thinking will become confused. Perhaps this is the essential problem that the patient needs to face most.

This ambiguity in definition is not rooted in the change of human will. The word "definition" has always been based on human cognition. The purpose is to divide the nature of things into a clear boundary for people to recognize more clearly. However, if the definition of "real and illusory" is vague at this time, then this vagueness. But it is definitely not because human beings deliberately confuse the concept, but a real change of existence. Just as a stone is no longer a stone, so the definition of "stone" no longer works.

In this case, it is meaningless to stick to whether the "stone" is a stone, just like now. This world may be the "real world" or it may be a "repeater trap". Under normal circumstances, of course, there is only one possibility, but if its essence is "may be the real world or the intermediate state of the repeater trap", then it must be one of them. Knowing it is not necessarily the right choice.

Perhaps, my thoughts were too arrogant, but I began to feel that the important factor that decided it was to continue to be an intermediate state, or to be biased towards reality or illusion, was on my body. My cognition, my observation of the world, may be the "Jiang" that exists in my body, or it may be the "Jiang" that exists in my delusion. It will be integrated into a complex parameter that determines the nature of this world. Based on my little knowledge of cutting-edge science, this situation is somewhat similar to the "observer effect" in quantum mechanics. Without mentioning whether the "observer effect" can cope with the current situation, whether it is right or wrong, I intuitively recognize the fact that I stand in the position of the "observer" and then have an impact.

Of course, in a world without weirdness and mystery, my arrogant and arrogant thoughts are also the most serious symbol of secondary disease. However, at this moment, when I met Bajing and Sakuya, I hoped that I was indeed a profound patient with secondary disease, because, in this way, the tragic fate was only for a patient with secondary disease. It's just a delusion. This is indeed something to be happy about, isn't it?

I let go and walked towards my home with the joy of enlightenment.

For several days after that, I have been fulfilling my duties as a top student. Although in the doomsday fantasy, I have not been a high school student for many years, but I came to this world to pick up textbooks and obey the school’s rules. Various rules and regulations, completing the tasks of the Student Union, did not feel any unsmoothness, nor did I feel the feeling of nostalgia after many years of things, just like all of this, it has never stopped in my life so far.

I didn't look for Sakiya again, and passed by several times, but only used my eyes to confirm her safety and happiness. Regarding the eight sceneries, since the self-study class that night, I haven’t mentioned the whisperer again. It’s almost like, when I made up my mind, everything returned to its original state. The seemingly weird and mysterious resurrection once again died down. . In the past few days, when I was studying in the evening, I passed by the secluded and deep alley many times, the deviated corners of the school, and the inner floors of the shadow-shrouded buildings. I did not feel the intuition of the agitation, what I heard at that time The auditory hallucinations have never appeared again.

The peaceful life makes me almost forget the doomsday fantasy and the reality of the hospital, but I will see some unnatural things in my dreams, but after waking up, when I look back, I can’t tell what it is. Dreamland is just like a normal and vague nightmare—however, its existence reminds me of the doomsday fantasy and the reality of the hospital. I pretend that I don't remember my abnormality, but in fact, I still understand that I am actually extremely abnormal, because I can't really think of myself as a patient with secondary disease.

According to the saying "Mental patients never say that they are mentally ill", I, who cannot regard myself as a secondary disease patient, should be a real secondary disease patient. However, the clarity and rationality of thinking is always observing myself from the perspective of a third party-I am not convinced that the "doomsday illusion" is real, but I can't confirm that the "doomsday illusion" is just a delusion, my Attitudes have always been swaying, just as I see this world as an intermediate state between reality and illusion, but it is also because of this that I feel that the world is constantly swaying between the two.

I told myself that as long as one of the results is affirmed, then everything will probably end. Since this world is so beautiful, what I care about, and the ones I love should all have a happy result, then, admit that the doomsday illusion is just a delusion of a secondary disease patient. However, there is always an excuse that I can’t cross before I make this decision—this excuse is sometimes the unseen Mae and the others, sometimes the passionate adventure in the doomsday fantasy, and sometimes the hospital reality. Gao Chuan's agreement sometimes seems to be the "Jiang" that is hidden deep in the body and soul, and has long been unfeeling.

In order to allow myself to make a decision as quickly as possible, I have been working hard to find Mae and the others outside of class. However, the process of my encounter with them in the doomsday illusion, compared with Hakkei Sakiya, did not have enough hint. Bajing and Sakuya have always been by my side. If you regard the doomsday illusion as a delusion, then you can completely regard them as the prototype to outline them in the doomsday illusion, although their behavior in the doomsday illusion, Putting it in this world is like a prophecy, but as long as you don’t touch it, it doesn’t seem to produce such a change. Of course, it is also possible that the same change has occurred, and I can’t recognize it if I don’t have in-depth contact with them. .

In contrast, my encounter with Zhenjiang, Marceau, Shise, and Dorothy was based solely on the fate after the weird and mysterious manifestations, based solely on their identity and location in the doomsday fantasy. For reference, then, these four people are very likely to be abroad. However, as a high school student, how can I find four people who should not know me in the vast sea of ​​overseas people?

More than a week later, in an accidental whim, I got some clues.

Although the actual environment of the hospital is very different from the doomsday illusion, considering that the "hospital" is only an isolated island environment, then the possibility of the external and the doomsday illusion also exists. However, based on the reality of the hospital Starting from experience, I went back to the orphanage where Mae and I stayed before they were infected by the "virus" ~ IndoMTL.com~, I found a photo that seemed full of instant sense of sight-it was on the Internet Many of the interior environment photography works of the welfare homes were turned out by accident. However, when I saw the photos and felt familiar and unfamiliar, I felt that this accident seemed to be a kind of destiny.

In the photos of the orphanage, there are only the scenes inside the building, and there are no people in it. Moreover, it has been on the Internet for several years, and there are many copied pictures. To sort out the clues step by step, it is not easy to find the photographer.

After working for more than a week, I found out the organizers of the photography competition through the Internet and telephone-it was not a successful and famous competition, but only held on the Internet-to win their trust Later, I found the photographer of this orphanage. Should it be unexpected, or should it be expected? The photographer has a name, gender and occupation that I am very familiar with.

"Doctor Ruan Li?" I began to feel that my actions have once again connected the world with the doomsday fantasy and the reality of the hospital. If possible, I really don't want to see this female psychologist again. Her existence always makes me feel that it is a sign of bad luck. (To be continued. If you like this work, you are welcome to come to the starting point () to vote recommended votes, monthly tickets, your support is my biggest motivation. Mobile users please go to read.)