Restricted Doomsday Syndrome Chapter 1539: Imaginary battlefield


The distorted Saya, abstract lines, operate, change, and entangle in ways that cannot be observed under normal conditions. Father Edward turned into a thread of shadow, and Novsky turned into a thread of light, becoming part of this complex and chaotic scene, and they could no longer be distinguished from it. I can only feel the deep, gloomy, gloomy, and inadequate horror from the bizarre phenomenon, the picture full of symbolic meaning and abstract consciousness. There are all kinds of illusions born in my mind, and there are many voices echoing in my mind, making me unable to distinguish whether it is my observation combined with my own cognition that generates these pictures and sounds, or It is these external images and sounds that squeeze into my mind in an extraordinary way.

I know that all of these have a real meaning, but I can't figure out what kind of truth is implied behind them. I can think, but I can’t prove whether the object of thinking is real or an illusion. I can’t make an accurate definition of what I feel, nor can I observe and find the logic hidden in it-I even think that they are illogical, although they are not. It is pure chaos and chaos, in which there must be a law, but this law seems to be hidden outside of its own thinking frame, and no matter who observes, no matter how deep knowledge and extensive cognition the observer has, the present All phenomena must be outside the frame of their thinking relative to the observer. Thus, "unintelligible" is achieved in this relative.

This is the "outside of human intelligence", I can only think so. My cognition is superficial, my wisdom is superficial, but in the face of the concepts of "infinite unknown" and "relatively known unknown", who can be called a wise man? The science education I received since I was a child occupies a huge proportion of my cognition of the world. Even if you are in the mystery, you can't help but bring in some scientific common sense and make judgments. Go to think about it, and now I feel like I'm witnessing subversion in a real sense. It may be possible to define its existence, but it is absolutely impossible to be dissected by scientific logic.

Science is not technology. Science is a logical worldview and methodology for cognizing the world and transforming the world. If the doomsday illusion is observed from the reality of the hospital, the doomsday illusion can also be summarized by science. But being in the doomsday illusion, only in terms of the phenomenon that occurs in the closed environment inside the doom illusion and unfolding in front of me, I have to think that it is so stupid. Mystery is mystery, something outside the framework of "scientific worldview and methodology".

The doomsday illusion is regarded as a world constructed by the "collective consciousness" of patients with doomsday syndrome relative to the reality of the hospital, and the mystery in the doomsday illusion is regarded as the result of the deep interaction of collective consciousness. This approach will be superficial The above seems a bit scientific, but if there is no experience of the hospital reality, if the hospital reality is only an "illusion" in the eyes of others? Regarding the world in which you exist, the world you observe. For others who have and only "doomsday fantasy", such as fire escape, file, John Bull and rivet, what is the meaning of such "science"? Just as Dr. Ruan Li of this repeater world told me. In her eyes, whether the recorded doomsday illusion or the hospital reality is just an illusion of me and others, to her, there is one and only one in her real world, which is this one in my eyes. Repeater world.

So, is her vision "limited", or are I and the others a group of "mental patients"?

These questions cannot be answered on a scientific level that I can understand. I don't get answers that can be recognized by myself on the level of mysticism that I know. I am vaguely aware that they only exist in the category of philosophy. However, so stupid me. How can you glimpse the answer you want from such a tormenting philosophy?

I think, keep thinking. When you can't get the answer anyway, when you can't understand and the problems that you can't solve become more and more, thinking no longer becomes interesting, more like a nightmare that you can't get rid of. However, thinking can no longer stop on its own. The problem is like the division of a virus. One becomes two, two becomes four, and four becomes eight. It multiplies like a power, just like my world. Questions are not filled with answers. The seemingly simple and unpretentious world seems to be distorted into a terrible monster by these questions, leaving me at a loss. I don’t know where to go into it and explore the true absolute meaning. The "real".

I can’t interfere with the phenomenon in front of me, too many thoughts, too many thoughts. While I am observing, it is like a flood hitting the invisible dam in my mind. I feel like I’m going crazy, but I can’t let it go. Stop by yourself. There are many memories like this time appearing in my mind, such as when I was fighting with the Moon God, or when I faced the unknown body and the indescribable fear in the past, I have personal experience not only at this moment. Every Gaochuan in the past also had a similar experience.

I have always known that as long as I don’t dwell on these issues, I can relax myself as long as I stop thinking, but when faced with such a terrible mystery, I can’t even "stop thinking". No, maybe in a sense, this kind of thinking movement that is like a new star explosion, torrential and unstoppable, is the deepest horror for any wise man brought about by these mysteries.

I can’t get the answer, I can’t stop, I can’t understand, I’m constantly denying myself, it’s like being stuck in a quagmire and suffocating, and it’s like being in a mist that can only be felt but cannot be seen clearly, as if oneself is a balloon, and Constantly being injected with the incredible gas called "mystery", constantly expanding and distorting, and then I felt that the place where there was nothing originally, the unknown monster hiding in it, is being peeped and played with by them. , Swallowing, a closer look, these monsters are made up of one by one "problems"-however, all of this is like an illusion that I feel.

When it swells to a limit—I think it’s about to reach my limit—I will explode and go crazy.

It's useless to close your eyes and not look at it. If you want to escape, you can't move your body. In other words, in this over-expanded thinking, the body's sense of existence is too small to be confirmed.

I can't tell. Is he on the peninsula or in a dream? Is he next to Saya? Still inside Saya. Saya was no longer what I had seen before, when I was patient. It seems to have become a part of the entire space. It exists in front, back, left, and right, in the phenomena that I can see, and in the sensations that I can’t see but can feel, and maybe still exist in I can't see or feel it, but the range that I can imagine, and what's more, is beyond my imagination.

The only thing I can be sure of is. Saya still exists, it has become incredible, but it has not stopped changing. In other words, even if it has become an indescribable thing at this moment, it is still in the process of transformation. The key to stopping it, or promoting it, and ultimately deciding its deeds lies in the four heavenly houses Kayako, Father Edward and Novsky.

Although I cannot observe, I cannot distinguish the status and behavior of these three. But you can imagine how violent they attacked and defended in an unobservable range. Captured and captured, guarded and guarded. Offensive and defensive, these behaviors cannot be described, but they must not only be an imagination, but an actual ongoing situation.

Sitianyuan Kayako and Novsky are of course an alliance. Father Edward is alone, but it is difficult to make people think that he will be defeated in front of this alliance. Because the impression of Father Edward was too mysterious and too profound. It is too powerful to let people see his depth and the real power that can burst out. Even if. The enemy he was going to face was a monster supported by a repeater in zone 51. On the other hand, it is also conceivable that in this repeater world, the power of the repeater in the 51st area will inevitably be limited, and it has to be evaluated by the alliance of Sitianyuan Jiayu and Novsky. The power possessed is further weakened.

I tried my best to transfer the thoughts of overreproduction to the imagination and deduction of the fighting situation of these three, and keep these thoughts away from each problem and the monster illusion constituted by each incomprehensible problem. The inexplicable form that comes from the unthinkable releases fear. Because of this, it is necessary not to "look at it". This so-called gaze is not "seeing it with your own eyes", but "don't even think about it." For me at this time, even "not thinking" is doing my best, and there is no guarantee to do it. From a very early time, not all thinking has been controlled by oneself.

I tried my best to imagine a scene that can be more recognized by myself. In this scene, the scene of the battlefield is as magnificent and weird as I can, and there are so many things that only exist in imagination. Sitianyuan Kayako, Novsky, and Father Edward, in only an impressionistic human form, intertwined, transformed, attacked, wounded, and screamed in this fantasy scene. The invisible faces of the three, He has an unclear look, a hot and blurred expression, as if different colors are changing. They flashed, reverberated, and shuttled in the indifferent space between heaven and earth, changing from a human form to a non-human form, and from a non-human form to a vague concept. In the final fantasy, all the images lose their form, but there is only one definition, which exists on the battlefield in a "meaning" and "concept" way, replaced by one word after another, just like the four heavenly houses. Coconut is no longer a person, but just a name like "Sitianin Gaya Coconut".

Words that describe concepts and meanings float in the void. They intersect and collide with each other, sometimes destroying other words, and sometimes breaking into more words. As a result, the densely packed text formed a waterfall in my mind, sometimes from bottom to top, sometimes from top to bottom, sometimes forming a whirlpool, and sometimes bursting from the inside. Each word can form a new meaning with the words up, down, left, and right. , Each word can form a new sentence with connected words, but there is no connection between adjacent meanings and meanings, and sentences and sentences do not form a clear expression through position. It seems to be correct to read the words and words. It is also describing the unreasonable battlefield. It seems to pick out a few words at random to form new words that have never been seen before. It is also meaningful, even to separate these words. In several parts, recomposing these parts into a new font structure, this new character is also meaningful.

I can't understand its meaning, but I can feel the bias of winning or losing from it. Although it is my own imagination and my own illusion, I feel that the real battlefield changes are going the same way as I am imagining, just as the information on the battlefield turns into an unobservable sensory experience and becomes my imagination. . It was "what was actually going on became my imagination", not "what I imagined."

Sitianyuan Kayako was so embarrassed when it was eaten by Saya, but just like her echo, all this is just the beginning of another plot. Father Edward fell into Gu, but it was not entirely unexpected. Novsky’s chaotic entry was a plan for the 51st District, but it was also in Father Edward’s expectation-all of this ~IndoMTL.com~ is my imagination, without any evidence, but from the perspective of self, It's like seeing and hearing with my own eyes.

When Sitianyuan Jiacoco, the incarnation of Maria, worked for District 51, she had a better understanding of repeaters than the other two. She experienced the predecessor of repeaters, "Night of Valpus "I have witnessed the changes in Youjiang and Alien Youjiang, participated in the composition of the repeater, and once personally acted as a human pillar, and experienced the difference between the night of Valpus and the repeater. She has worked with Gao Chuan and different types of mystery experts, and has been hostile. As a grotesque factor of mystery events, she exists in a world that many mystery experts cannot explore. All her experiences have become her strength at this time. She can be a monster or a human being. The existence and thinking change between the two, which is as natural and simple as breathing for her. Therefore, her ability to control Heishui far exceeds Father Edward’s expectations, and the erosion of Heishui under her control to Saya is by no means vulnerable on the surface, even in Saya. After combining with mandala. She knew that the enemy she really wanted to defeat was not Saya, and what she needed to do was not fighting for control of Heishui. There is one and only one enemy, Father Edward himself.

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