Restricted Doomsday Syndrome Chapter 2010: The light behind the door

There are some similarities to me, and some differences from me. Sometimes I think she thinks too little, but sometimes it makes me think that it is the right way to think so far. She did not hold a positive attitude to me just because I extended a helping hand. On the contrary, this gave me a sense of relief, although I don't think that among the people I have seen so far, who has said and done something must be correct. However, in the final analysis, what I am doing right now is probably not something absolutely correct, because I have never seen something truly absolutely correct happen, so there is no objective evaluation standard at all. So, I just feel relieved by her firm attitude expressed at this time.

When facing the long and dark future, when facing the desperation that can be seen with open eyes, when no matter how thinking, it is impossible to get an absolutely correct conclusion, no matter what action it is difficult to jump out of the vicious circle that has been realized, When "objective reality" and "subjective consciousness" are beginning to confuse, only "attitude" can make people feel gratified.

To talk about what has changed in my conversation with Yu, I think, probably nothing has changed. However, for me, this dialogue is definitely not meaningless, and I hope it is also true for her.

"At this time, I really want to say: You will definitely not be my opponent-it is better not to say such things as expected?" I said.

"...Didn't you already say it? Mr. Gao Chuan." The corners of his mouth twitched a little.

I couldn't help laughing "haha".

"If, I said, if there are things in this world that will not change the result whether you do or not, will you choose to do it or not?" I asked.

"If you do, you may not be able to change the result, but who can be sure that it will not change the result? And, at least the process can be changed." He replied without hesitation: "Moreover, just because you think you can't change the result. It’s too utilitarian to do it. I don’t want to be such a utilitarian."

"Even if it turns out that it doesn't matter, it's a waste of effort?" I asked.

"For myself, I don't think it's a waste of effort." She replied.

"What if you end up feeling that it was a waste of effort?" I asked.

"This is my choice, and I shouldn't betray my choice." She replied so positively.

"So, this is the answer I gave you." I said to her seriously: "Even if people think that the ultimate goal is opposite, the position is fundamentally inconsistent. It is a hypocritical performance. I still did something Things, such as saving you from those physical beings. Although contradictory, it is indeed my own choice. Besides..."

"Other than that?"

"Besides, who can be sure that our ultimate goal is opposite? You think that the monster in the human collective subconscious is the ultimate goal, but how do you prove that it is the ultimate goal? It is the culprit that ultimately destroys the world, the strongest and most evil BOSS, but what if it is not?" I asked. Because, I really doubt it. For me, no, for Dorothy and Shise, this so-called "monster in the collective human subconscious" is definitely not the most direct and ultimate enemy. In other words, it is probably just a springboard for us to find the "virus", and it is the most suitable springboard we have found so far. From this perspective, suppose that today's Internet ball has been Controlling the color, then, the cyberball should also be waiting for this monster to appear. Therefore, the opposition between the cyberball and the Doomsday Shinrikyo cult before it appears, temporarily does not have any substance.

"So, on the other hand, how do you prove that it is not the culprit?" Shi retorted.

"I can't prove it, so I want to see it." I said: "As long as I see it, I can understand if it is."

"What if it is? What if it is not?" she asked.

"If it is, it is the final battle. If it is not, then there must be a clue to the ultimate culprit." I replied: "These things must be seen to confirm. Only by imagination, there is no answer. We are only imagining its existence now, and cannot confirm whether it really exists and where? In what way—we must lock the target before attacking. This is the limit of human beings. Beyond this, human beings are all It can’t be done. The same is true for me. Even if I want to order or save, if I don’t find and lock the enemy’s body, I can’t do anything. Of course, if I lock the enemy, I may not be able to do anything. But without this beginning, then nothing can start."

Whether it is me, other Gaochuan, or Dorothy and Shise, and even the researchers in the hospital reality, they all know this very well, and just to achieve this start, they are already exhausted. It's done. However, until now, this beginning has not been reached.

She fell silent again. She seemed to disagree a bit, but she didn't refute it either. I have always believed that people have limits, and when many people gather together, they cannot exceed their own limits. It is not only the limit of ability, but also the limit of thinking, even the so-called unlimited. Imagination and logic will actually feel a vague barrier when inflated to a certain level-thinking sometimes makes people feel smart, but as long as you keep thinking and investigating the bottom line, you will definitely be better than thinking. I feel smart even more stupid. The more you think, the more you can clearly feel the existence of this barrier.

"Anyway, I still don’t want to see that thing, and many people don’t want to... But that’s what comes after. Now what I have to deal with is the physical life, and I also feel that I am now It’s enough to pay attention to the physical life.” Shi broke the silence and said: “Although Mr. Takakawa, you actually saved my life, but if you really become an enemy in the actual situation, I will also be pregnant. I apologize to do my best to destroy you."

"...enough." I smiled, without any dissatisfaction or disappointment in my heart, on the contrary, she said exactly what I wanted her to say. I can't confirm what I want to express, whether it has been understood by her, or whether the seeds that I planted in her heart will germinate, but I think her present statement is enough. However, I can also imagine what an uphill battle she will face. No, seriously speaking, all battles that require life and enlightenment will not be easy.

"Then, I sincerely wish you alive." I wished sincerely.

"Are you leaving? Mr. Gao Chuan." Shi asked. I felt that her gaze had passed over my shoulder and landed on the door that was one-third open. Because of her previous actions, I have turned around and turned my back to the door, but I can still feel the light pouring in from the door still making it hard to see anything outside the door.

The line of light that bursts in is so huge, my vision has been covered by the light from the rear, and I can't see the scenery in the pipeline further away. The shadow of me and I shrank in the light that spread across the floor.

Then, I felt an extremely familiar aura, standing outside the gate. This familiarity is like the wind of a long-lost hometown, like the air that has been breathed in unknown places, like the smell that is deep in the memory but can’t remember, like the numb hands and feet regaining consciousness, like It is a certain melody that I hear, and it seems that there is a certain rhythm that I have always cared about-all of which are not exactly the same as the vague outline in the memory, but they can be distinguished, not the sense of sight It’s an illusion, but there really is such an experience.

My breathing stopped for a while, and my brain seemed to be caught by this familiar breath. My thoughts and body were a bit stiff, unable to react immediately. On the contrary, I was not affected, but saw my anomaly. In the ever-stronger light and ever-thinning shadow, it was as if standing on the boundary line between the two, and the stunned and vigilant expression also seemed to be divided into two parts by light and shadow. This is really a wonderful and beautiful scene, just like a painting that only uses gray scales and white space to express the artistic conception. The rough pen and ink reveals exceptionally delicate.

I think I can read and understand the inner activities at this time, but I can't express it in words.

I didn't see the figure outside the door, but I already knew who it was.

"What's the matter? Mr. Gaochuan, the enemy?" Shi didn't seem to feel anything, just staring in vain at the ever-increasing light, but soon she also had to squint her eyes.

It's too bright, it's too bright, how can it be so bright? What is there in the world behind the door? It's almost like the spotlights on the stage are all hitting here, penetrating the center line of the door and shooting in, making it hard for people to breathe, and the heartbeat speeds up.

No, assuming this is the spotlight on the stage, then being able to focus here means what an influential character the person on stage is.

"Don't you feel it? That very strong sense of presence, a sense of presence that matches this light perfectly." I asked.

"Keep... a sense of existence?" She was stunned, but she seemed to be struggling with the light. She was opposite to me, my back was facing the door, and she was facing the door. She can only stretch her hand to block her face, but gradually find it difficult to continue observing, "I’m in trouble, isn’t it? Is it the enemy? I don’t feel...Is there really something over there? Yes, it’s too bright. It's abnormal... Mr. Gaochuan, don't you run?"

"No need, it's not an enemy." When I said this, I paused subconsciously to confirm with a certain mood: "No need to escape, it's not an enemy."

"Is that... Mr. Gao Chuan’s acquaintance?" When I said this, I saw that the shadow under our feet had completely disappeared, and the darkness in the visible range all around was so rich that it seemed to be turned into The substantial light dissipated, and in such a pure light, I felt as if I was melting. Obviously I don't feel the heat.

"Are we melting? Mr. Gaochuan!" Yu suddenly shouted, as if she was afraid that her voice would be swallowed by the terrible light. There was a sense of fear clearly on her face, and her five senses were in the light. It becomes blurred, and the outline of the details seems to be distorted. Even when facing the elementary life, I have never seen her have such a strong fear. She seems to be unable to move her feet.

"Beyond the fear...Think of the previous conversation, and use your steadfastness to transcend this fear!" I yelled to her. Although I don't feel the danger, it may just be safe for me. No one will feel fear for no reason, even if it is an emotion that suddenly emerges, there must be a source that operates in her thoughts. Suddenly, she fell into fear, and she might not be able to react. It was not the entity that made her fear, but a certain factor in her consciousness was touched.

This kind of situation that is directly touched by the sense of fear on the level of consciousness is as simple as breathing in the person I am familiar with. Her sense of existence is so strong and so aggressive~IndoMTL.com~ If you can't transcend this fear, rely on your own thinking or will to regain your sense of existence, it is likely to be destroyed directly-no , To be more precise, it is her self that will be eroded away.

She can't be the person targeted, she can only say that she was not lucky enough to encounter such a situation. However, as long as this is not a conscious attack, there is a chance of resistance.

"You won’t forget so soon, are you? What I just said. Think about it, what did I say, what did you think, and what decision you made! What was your mood at the time? Awareness!" Yes, what I said will not directly help her, but as long as she remembers it, as long as she remembers it, she can definitely return to the self-awareness at the time and improve her self-awareness. Resistance. Because the final decision made after distress and thinking is very clear and pure.

It was just a few short words. The complexion on the face is still not good, but the outline of the face that I can see has recovered from the distorted line again. I couldn't help but breathe a sigh of relief. Unexpectedly, her influence on Yu outside the door would be so strong and so direct.

"It's passed, it's passed..." Yu said with difficulty. Although there is no beginning and no end, I understand how she feels. It was like having survived the strongest and most dangerous impact when the torrent struck.

"Don't take it lightly, do you still feel scared?" I am too familiar with this situation.

"Yes, it's terrible. What the **** is that? Mr. Gaochuan, you said, that's not an enemy, right? But if it's not an enemy, how could..." I was a little surprised.

"It's just that you have bad luck. No, it should be said. In fact, everyone's luck is bad, so she will appear." I don't like to ridicule others. What I am saying now is indeed my sincerity. Thoughts.