The Rise of Phoenixes Chapter 124:
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Feng Zhiwei was silent for a long time and said: "I can't let such a face die in front of me."
Both of them understood the meaning of this sentence. Ning Yi was silent for a moment, and Feng Zhiwei raised her eyes to look at him, "This is a question I have always wanted to ask. Do you have an answer?"
Ning Yi was silent for another moment. Feng Zhiwei actually saw a look of confusion in his eyes. Then he shook his head and said, "I was also very surprised when I first saw you."
This means that she doesn’t know the reason. Feng Zhiwei looked at his eyes carefully and felt that although he still seemed to have something to say, the words themselves did not seem like he was lying to her.
"I'm sorry that Shaoning didn't die and caused you a lot of trouble." She said in a low voice after a while, "But this is all I can do."
"So this is how it is between us." Ning Yi smiled a bit bitterly, "We don't want to be in opposition, but we are always pushed into opposition for various reasons."
"But I don't understand why there is a confrontation?" Feng Zhiwei stood up and stared at Ning Yi, "Tell me, why do you want to restrict my development in Qingming? Why did you put me under Yao Ying? Being controlled everywhere? Why do you think I will be against you? Also, why do you pay so much attention to Feng Hao?"
Her bent face was very close. Even though she was wearing a mask, her eyes were misty and glistening with autumn water. Her long eyelashes were as neat as brushes. Ning Yi couldn't help but stretched out his hand to caress Feng Zhiwei as if he was electrocuted. Get out of the way immediately.
"We are discussing business." She said with a straight face, "Pay attention."
Ning Yi thought that her rare shy expression was very cute. He stared at her with reluctance for a while and then said: "You have saved Shaoning twice. There is an unclear relationship between you and her, and even They all have strikingly similar looks. You have mastered too many secrets of mine, but they may not belong to me. Do you think, from the perspective of a superior, should you be restricted or even silenced?"
"Your Highness has never thought of recruiting me as a 'national scholar'?" Feng Zhiwei frowned, feeling that there was something wrong with Ning Yi's answer.
Ning Yi remained silent, holding a cup of tea to his lips for a long time without drinking it. A faint water vapor came up, and his brows were blurred behind the water vapor.
Feng Zhiwei didn't say anything. She touched the edge of the tea cup with her fingers. The touch was warm, but her heart felt cold.
After a while, Ning Yi said softly: "Zhiwei, listen to my advice, leave the officialdom and return to Qiu Mansion. I will find a way to make He Lianzheng withdraw. In the future, you will be mine..."
He reached into his arms, as if he was about to take out something.
My hand was held down.
He lowered his eyes and looked at the white fingers pressing on his hand, "Are you expressing your rejection?"
Feng Zhiwei took back her hand and said calmly: "Let's explain what happened today clearly first, and then we can talk about this later."
Slowly closing his hand, Ning Yi smiled blankly, and said after a while: "Okay, then you tell me first, why do you, a woman, refuse to marry and have children like other women, but take risks to live in the world? Officialdom, both cautious and bold, climbing up step by step?"
Feng Zhiwei fell silent, looking at the clouds in the sky with her hands behind her hands, her long hair scattered in the wind, hiding her eyes that were already covered by clouds even more.
"Probably no one in the Imperial Capital has ever seen my father." Feng Zhiwei spoke slowly for a while, as if he was talking about another topic, "In my memory, he existed before I was four years old."
"He is a busy, indifferent, and mysterious existence."
Ning Yi stared at her blankly, vaguely feeling that the man who once spread the word in the imperial capital and made a generation of female heroes resolutely elope and then return to the capital sadly was the crux of the problem.
"Before I was four years old, my family had a very prosperous life. We lived in a deep mountain far away from the Imperial Capital. Although the place was remote, the supply was always very good. However, my father was often away and only came home once in a while. When he came back, he said to me My brother and I didn't pay much attention to him, and my mother didn't look happy when she saw him, and sometimes the look on her face was a little sad."
Ning Yi frowned, a little confused. Since they ran away to get married at all costs and had a son and a daughter, the couple should be extremely loving and stay together day and night. Why is this happening?
"For this reason, ever since I was sensible, I have gradually stopped looking forward to my father coming home. With him around, the atmosphere is depressing and the mood is low, without the usual harmony and warmth of mother and son. In my opinion, such a man , let the mother stay alone in the empty boudoir to raise the children alone, and let the children have a father as if they had no father. When they come back, they still cannot give people happiness, and it is better to have nothing."
"In my long memory, my mother has always told me that although most women in the world are dodder flowers, some people are not so lucky to rely on men. Rather than wait until they are abandoned by fate in the future, It’s better to learn how to rely on yourself and love yourself first.”
"My mother taught me a lot of things and also taught my younger brother, but my younger brother is not talented enough. My mother said that I am the eldest sister. Since my younger brother is incompetent, he and my mother will have to rely on me to support him in the future. This is my responsibility. I always remember it. ."
“Nonsense!” Ning Yi couldn’t help but refute, “How can there be any reason for you, a weak woman, to support your family?”
"There are no weak women in the Feng family." Feng Zhiwei looked at him calmly with clear eyes, "If the women in the Feng family were weak, they would have been trampled into dust long ago."
Ning Yi looked at her and suddenly stretched out his hand to hold her hand. The hand in his palm was slightly cool and smooth, as soft as boneless, but there were some thin calluses in the palm. The thin hard touch on the bottom of the hand made him feel I don't know where the pain is.
Feng Zhi slightly lowered his eyes to look at the clasped hands, smiled, and took his hands out.
"When I was four years old, he really didn't come back." She continued, "Without his supply, the family gradually couldn't make ends meet, so my mother had no choice but to take us back to Beijing."
"This is the beginning of my encounter with the Imperial Capital." Feng Zhiwei smiled at Ning Yi, "From the time I knelt in the Qiu Mansion in the cold winter and couldn't open the door and was poured a basin of cold footwashing water, the Imperial Capital and I, and Qiu Mansion, and the war of rejection and humiliation by the world, there is no turning back."
“When you need it most, no one is standing by your side to shield you from the wind and rain. You have to block all the hostility, bullying, difficulties, and frame-ups yourself, and you have to find ways to block it for your loved ones. You have to be on guard at every step. Life is very tiring, but no matter how tired you are, you can't retreat. Once you retreat, your life's destiny will be decided casually."
"We are the shame of Qiu Mansion. Everyone wants us to disappear. If we don't want to disappear, we have to pay the price." Feng Zhiwei lowered her eyes, "I have lived like this for ten years, and every New Year in the small courtyard While eating the shabby New Year’s Eve dinner and listening to the laughter in the main room, I swore to myself that I would never rely on anyone, never count on anyone, and one day I would rely entirely on myself, live above others, and let those who look down on me Those who have surpassed me look up to me in the dust."