Eastern Palace Chapter 32: Yuanshui(1)
lnmao.org, the fastest update of the latest chapters of the East Palace!
"The water of forgetting the river lies in forgetting emotion..."
……
"A fox sits on the sand dunes, sitting on the sand dunes, looking at the moon. Hey, it turns out that he is not looking at the moon, but the girl waiting for the return of the sheep..."
"It's too ugly! Change one!"
"I can only sing this song..."
……
"From life to life, I will forget you forever!"
……
There is a bright and extinguished light in the memory, flickering, like a thick fog gradually spreading out, revealing an illusory mirage. I suddenly opened my fuzzy eyes, and everything gradually became clear.
I saw Adu, and she was standing next to me. I also saw Yongniang. Her eyes were also red and slightly swollen.
I saw the delicate flowers embroidered on the tent, I slowly recognized that this is the East Palace, my own bedroom.
I breathed out slowly, feeling like I had a nightmare. A terrible thing happened in the dream: I was taken captive by the assassin, and then the assassin turned out to be Gu Jian. Under Tianmen, I watched Li Chengyin upstairs... The most terrifying thing is that I dreamed that I knew Li Chengyin a long time ago. He was called Gu Xiaowu. He slaughtered the Turks, killed Aweng, and died. My mother-in-law... My father is crazy, and I was forced to jump off Wangchuan... This nightmare is really terrible... so terrible that I don’t even dare to think about it...
Fortunately, all that was just a nightmare, I slowly grabbed Yong Niang's hand, smiled at her, and wanted to say: "I'm so hungry..."
I couldn't make any sound. My throat felt a sharp pain, and the air flow swirled in my mouth, but I couldn't speak. I was so anxious that I jammed my neck with my hand, and Yong Niang held my hand with tears in her eyes: "Don’t worry, the crown prince, the doctor said that you are only anxious, so you burned your throat. Slowly adjust it naturally. ……"
I looked at Adu and Yongniang. Gong E held a cup of clear dew, and Yong Niang personally fed it to me. The sweet fragrance of clear dew and the slightly cool taste made me feel so comfortable, immediately Alleviated the pain in the throat. I swallowed, Yong Niang said: "Slower, slower... Don't choke... Alas... I haven't got any drips in the past few days... But I almost rushed to the slave girl..."
How many days?
How many days have I slept?
I asked for paper and pen for drawing. Yong Niang was busy asking someone to bring it to me. Gong E was holding the inkstone. I was soaked in ink, but when I started writing, I suddenly hesitated.
What do you write?
What should I ask? Ask if the Turks are really a whole family, ask my father, is he already crazy? When I arrived in Zhongshan, he had never sent anyone to see me, and Xiliang, who I thought about day and night, had never sent anyone to see me. I didn't feel weird at all before. I used to blame Daddy for being ruthless, but now I know that my Xiliang has already become a dream. I didn't dare to ask Adu at all, so how dare I to ask Yong Niang?
It’s been a long time since I could write.
The ink on the tip of the pen condensed for too long, and finally fell with a click, dripping onto the paper, and splashing a ball of ink.
I suddenly thought of "Pomo Gate", of the magnificent pictures of mountains and rivers drawn by Li Chengyin with Yanzhi and Luozidai, of Mingyufang, of the song that night, of the sword, light and sword shadow that night... Sharp arrow, swear loudly... I think of the real sword light and blood shadow in my dream, I think of me singing on the sand dunes, I think of Gu Xiaowu catching a hundred fireflies for me, I think of forgetting the cold wind on the river... …And the painful look on his face when I cut off the belt with a knife myself...
I dropped the pen and hurriedly buried myself in the quilt again. I was afraid I would remember.
Yong Niang thought I was still uncomfortable, so she gently patted my back, like coaxing a child to sleep, slowly patted me.
Adu walked away lightly. Although her voice was soft, I could hear her.
I suddenly feel sad. I didn't even dare to ask Adu, Turk, and past things. Are the things I thought of in my dreams true?
A'du must be more sad than me. She is obviously a Turkic, but she has been with me. She has been with me to the Central Plains. She has been with me and my enemy for so long... I have become more timid than I have ever been. I don't want to know anymore.
I slept in a dazed room for most of the day. In the evening, Yong Niang awakened me and asked me to drink the extremely bitter concoction.
Then Yong Niang asked me if I would like something to eat.
I shook my head, I don't want to eat anything.
What else can I eat now?
Yongniang still ordered someone to make soup cakes. She said: "The soup cakes are soft and there is soup. People who are sick eat this very well."
I didn't want to eat soup cakes, so I picked up a chopstick and put it down.
The soup cake reminds me of Li Chengyin.
In fact, everything in the East Palace reminds me of Li Chengyin.
I just don't want to think of him again. Regardless of whether it was true or not, I instinctively didn't want to see him again.
But I can’t avoid it. When Li Chengyin came to see me, Yongniang just took the soup cake away. He walked in with a smile, just like before, only I know that everything is the same as before. It's the same. We have such an unbearable past. The Shenshui of Wangchuan made me forget everything and made him forget everything. We were so muddled that we became pros. And I am confused, and spent three years with him here...
Without waiting for me to finish thinking, Li Chengyin has already walked quickly to the side of my bed, then reached out his hand to touch my forehead.
I avoided one side of my face.
He touched his hand, but he was not angry. Instead, he said, "You finally woke up. I'm really worried."
I looked at him quietly, like a stranger. He finally felt wrong and asked me: "What's wrong with you?"
When he saw that I ignored him, he said: "That day you were taken away by the assassin, and it was Shangyuan again, and Jiumendong opened..."
I just feel unspeakably impatient. I don't remember the way he stood on the tower that day, but the way I stood on Wangchuan that day, I'm afraid I will remember it all my life. What's the use of talking about this now? Does he want to lie to me again with sweet words? In this way, he has forgotten all the things from the past, but I remembered it, I already remembered it!
He said: "...I haven't seen you in the city for several days, I thought..." At this point, his voice slowly lowered and said, "I thought I would never see you again..."
He stretched out his hand and wanted to touch my shoulder. I remembered my father’s blurred tears, I remembered A-niang falling in a pool of blood, I remembered A Weng’s last cry, I remembered Hefu's blood-stained hands Pushing me on the horse... I suddenly pulled out the golden hairpin and pierced it towards his chest.
I tried my best all at once, and he didn't even think that I would stab him suddenly, so he was shocked, and he instinctively reached out to cover his chest until the last moment. The golden hairpin is extremely sharp, and it has been piercing his entire palm, and the blood slowly pouring out. He stared at me in a daze. The look in his eyes was so complicated that I couldn't understand it, as if I didn't believe that I did something like this. .
Actually, I don't believe it myself. I pressed my chest and felt that I was shaking.
After a long time, he grabbed the golden hairpin and pulled it out. He pulled it out extremely quickly, and he didn't even hum, but frowned slightly, as if it wasn't his own flesh and blood at all. The blood rushed out immediately, and I watched the blood flow like a puff, flowing down his wrists to the sleeves of his robe. The red blood was like a serpentine snake, slowly crawling onto the clothes. He held the **** golden hairpin and looked at me. Suddenly, I felt flustered, as if breathless.
He threw the golden hairpin on the ground with a soft "clang" sound, and the amethyst jingluo falling from the golden hairpin scattered around, and Ding Ding Dongdong fell to the ground. His voice was soft and faint, as if he was afraid of alarming something, and asked: "Why?"
How can I talk about such an unbearable past? The grudges between me and him are separated by a sea of blood. It turns out that forgetting is not misfortune, but real luck. Like him, it would be great to forget everything in the past.
I deceived myself and turned away, but he said, "I know."
I don’t know what he knows, but his voice seems to show a faint chill: “I didn’t want to ask you because you were so ill. But in that case, I can’t help but ask, how did you get from the assassin Where did you escape? It was Adu holding you back. How to ask her, she would not say where the assassin was, let alone where he saved you. She is from Xiliang, so I can’t torture you. But you have to tell me who instigated the assassin..."
I looked at this man, this man who fell with me to Wangchuan, he has forgotten everything, but I will never forget, I will never forget that he killed Aon, I don’t I will forget that it was he who made my family ruined. I will never forget that I will never go back to Xiliang. I opened my mouth without making any sound, I just looked at him almost mockingly. He actually came to ask me who the assassin was? Doesn't he know who the assassin is? Or after he fell into Wangchuan, who had forgotten Gu Jian?
I looked at him and he looked at me. After a long time, he suddenly threw a pair of jade pendants in front of me. I stared at the pair of mandarin ducks with mutton fat jade. I recognized this pair of jade pendants. I once held it on the sand dunes for three days and three nights. At that time, he was still called Gu Xiaowu; at that time, I was happily waiting for the beloved I thought; at that time, he held the pair of jade pendants in his hand and smiled narrowly at me; at that time, in the desert of Xiliang King City Outside, there is the purest night sky, and with him, I will go back to the city.
At that time, neither of us looked as hideous as we are now. I am still the carefree nine princesses of Xiliang, and he is Gu Xiaowu from the Central Plains.
Li Chengyin's hands were still bleeding. He held my arm and pinched my bones. He forced me to look up and look straight into my eyes. He asked: "Why?"
He asked again why.
I also want to know, why, why fate will tease us so, time and time again, forcing the two of us into such a decisive past. I looked into his eyes, his eyes turned out to be unspeakable pain, still with the last trace of hope, as if expecting me to say something.
I opened my mouth, but didn't say anything.
The blood on his hand touched my face, and it didn’t bring any temperature. He said, “Why did you come back from the assassin safe and sound, why did Adu refuse to tell me where the assassin was? You will have such a pair of mandarin ducks in your hand... mandarin ducks mandarin ducks... I took apart your pair of mandarin ducks, right?"
The strength of his hands made my shoulder hurt sharply. I was suddenly frustrated. Above Wangchuan, what kind of mentality did he have to jump with me? Is it just to say that to me? That sentence of Central Plains that I don’t understand at all? I have long forgotten what that sentence said. I only remember Pei Zhao's last exclaim, he must have been horrified. After all, Li Chengyin was not Gu Xiaowu, but my Gu Xiaowu had already died in the chaos. I finally raised my eyes and looked at him. His eyes were dark, and my shadow was reflected in them. Who is he? Is it Gu Xiaowu who catches fireflies for me? Or the lover who left me at the wedding? Or, above Wangchuan, watching me cut my belt, can the regret on his face be true?
I have been deceived by this man time and time again, until now, who knows if he is lying to me? He swore to the assassin Zengjian, speaking so plausibly, but in a blink of an eye, he and Zhao Liangdi stood on the Chengtian Gate...My Gu Xiaowu was already dead, I thought of this, but my heart was cut. My voice was fragmented and terrible, unlike my own voice. I said: "You broke us apart, you broke me-and Gu Xiaowu."
He was startled, and after a while, he smiled contemptuously: "Gu Xiaowu?"
I looked at him, his hands were still bleeding gurglingly down to the bottom of his robe. When I was above Wangchuan, my heart felt like ashes, but at this moment, I didn't even have the strength to struggle. I feel very tired and very tired. I said word by word: "You killed Gu Xiaowu."
My Gu Xiaowu, the only person I ever loved, was killed by him just like that. He was killed in Turkic, he was killed in our unfinished wedding, and he was killed in Xiliang.
I was confused and forgot everything before, and then I came here and got married with Li Chengyin. And he--I forgot everything, I didn't even know that Gu Xiaowu was dead.
He was very angry and smiled: "Good! Good! Very good!"
He didn't look at me again, turned around and left.
When Yong Niang came back, she was very surprised and said, "How did your highness go?" She exclaimed immediately, "Oh, why is there so much blood on the ground..."
She asked Gong E to come in to wipe the blood stains, and then asked me what happened. I didn't want to let her know, and numbly let her toss me and toss me away.
What should I do? Can I go back to Xiliang? Even if he returned to Xiliang, Gu Xiaowu was already dead.
Yong Niang thought I was going to sleep when I was tired, so she didn't ask any more questions. She asked Adu to come in and accompany me to sleep, but Adu still slept on the thick felt in front of my bed.
But I couldn't sleep anymore, I got up, Adu got up immediately, and poured me a cup of tea, she thought I was going to drink water.
I didn't take the tea in her hand, but took her hand and wrote in the palm of her hand.
I asked her, shall we go back to Xiliang?
Adu nodded.
I feel very at ease, she will follow me wherever I go. I don't know how she had suffered so much before, and I don't know how she came here willingly with me. I took her by the hand, and suddenly tears fell from my eyes. Seeing me crying, A'du suddenly panicked. She wiped my tears with her sleeves. I wrote in the palm of her hand, don't worry. Adu was very sad, she put me in her arms and slowly stroked my hair, like a child. She comforted me like this, and I slowly closed my eyes.
Actually, I understand in my heart that I am finished. I used to like Gu Xiaowu. After I forgot everything, I like Li Chengyin again. Even if he lied to me time and time again, I still love him.
The water of forgetting river lies in forgetting emotion. Anyone who has been immersed in divine water will forget all the troubles they have experienced. I forgot about him, and he forgot about me, the two of us have no relationship. But why would I fall in love with him again after forgetting everything? He has never been good to me, but I just like him. Over the past three years, we have pushed each other away time and time again, but why have we got here today? The gods once obeyed my prayers and made me forget all the pain and troubles he put on me. But is God punishing me today? Let me remember everything again, after falling in love with him again.
Li Chengyin never came to see me again.
I have been ill for a long time. When I can speak again, the magnolia flowers outside the eaves have already faded, and the cherry blossoms in the atrium have bloomed like pink clouds.
Cherry blossoms are earlier than peach and plum trees, so once the cherry blossoms, it feels like spring has come. In the courtyard, a few cherry blossom trees were like a pavilion, and blooming flowers resembling a stream of light, clusters and clusters, which looked like lilac gauze, clustered under the eaves, and some of them even came into the window.
A lot of things happened when I was sick, and Yong Niang told me. First of all, the first Fu Ye Cheng was impeached and sold off, and then I heard that the punishment was so widespread that everyone in the Korean Central Committee was in danger for a while, for fear of being counted as a "Ye Party." Then Pei Kuang, the general of Xiaoqi who conquered Goryeo, victorious and returned to the court. His Majesty rewarded him with a lot of gold and silver. There is also a concubine in His Majesty's new book, very young and very beautiful. She is called "Lady" in the palace. It is said that His Majesty dotes on her very much. Even the concubine Gao Gui who temporarily took the 6th palace is dwarfed. Everyone talked about whether your Majesty would make her a queen, because such grace is really rare. Whether it’s the court or the palace, I listen to it with my left ear, and with my right ear, I forget it.