Tears in Heaven Chapter 15: When I miss you (5)


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I don't know why he can't sleep. Maybe it's the sound of wind and rain outside the house, or the sound of the waves, maybe it's a strange environment, maybe it's no reason, just want to smoke a cigarette.

It's pitch black in the room, and pitch black outside, leaving only the sound of wind and rain in the world. The sound of her breathing is very subtle, but it is still audible in the noise of rain, like a cat, or some other small animal, not snoring, just snorting, and sleeping soundly. And the night is so quiet, even though it is windy and rainy outside, the air in the room seems to solidify like amber, and the sleeping bag is so warm that it almost feels irritating.

I finally got up, looking for the cigarette case in the backpack, the lighter "clicked", the flame rose, and the cigarette was lit, but inadvertently cut through the darkness of silence. The slightly swaying flame, radiating a yellowish halo, suddenly saw her falling asleep deeply, her black hair curled by the pillow, and her slightly side face was like a bright moon on the sea, and it was incredibly white and white.

He turned off the lighter and quietly finished smoking. There is no smoke ring in the darkness, but the smell of tobacco penetrates into the lungs, with a slight bitterness. Outside the house, the rain is intensive, and it seems that this small island in the sea has become a small boat, ups and downs in the waves of ten thousand miles.

The rain didn't stop the next day, but it got worse and worse. Du Xiaosu woke up very early, but Lei Yuzheng was already up. She went to the kitchen, and Miss Sun had just lighted the fire, so she volunteered to help cook breakfast. The radio is broadcasting the weather forecast, and the typhoon is moving to the south. Fortunately, the center of the typhoon is very far away from the island, which is only affected by the outer wind.

The children brushed their teeth and washed their faces under the eaves. Breakfast was porridge and noodle fish. Du Xiaosu fried the fish, but the children still ate with relish. Teacher Xiaosun smiled after eating the burnt noodle fish. Du Xiaosu felt embarrassed, and removed all the fried noodles outside: "Just eat fish, it's not good for your health to eat it fried."

After eating breakfast, she took out the stationery and extra-curricular books she had brought, and the children cheered for a while, like a holiday.

The rain is getting bigger and bigger, and the wind is getting stronger and stronger. Teacher Xiaosun fears that the typhoon will transfer over. He took hammers, nails, and wooden boards to reinforce all the doors and windows in the classroom under the rain. Lei Yuzheng was helping him when he saw Du Xiaosu bend down to hug the plank, walked over and pushed her away: "This kind of thing is not done by women."

He hugged the plank and walked over, braved the wind and rain outside the window with Mrs. Sun, hammering and nailing, and it took a long time to finish it.

As a result, both of them were soaked, their wet clothes stuck to their bodies, and they were blown by the sea breeze to the bones. Du Xiaosu doesn't know how to use a large stove. It was Teacher Xiaosun who made the fire. She frittered a pot of **** soup. Teacher Xiaosun didn't say anything, Lei Yuzheng frowned and drank it. She doesn't cook very often, so she looked at him with a guilty conscience: "Is the **** soup spicy?"

Ginger soup is of course a bit spicy, but it's better than the fried fish in the morning.

Looking at her clumsy hands while cooking lunch, he couldn't help it: "Give me the apron, you can go out."

She was taken aback, as if thinking of something, but said nothing, and silently took off her apron and handed it to him.

Ms. Xiaosun was burning the fire in the stove, and Du Xiaosu was doing miscellaneous work beside him, handing dishes to bowls or something. As a result, Lei Yuzheng cooked a total of four dishes, all of which were fish. The children ate the rice bowls upright, and they all yelled that Uncle Xiao Shao’s cooking is so delicious, and even the fish is so delicious.

Du Xiaosu is also quite proud: "Uncle Xiao Shao is the best, and the cooking is also very delicious, much better than what I cooked."

The little girl also laughed: "Sister Xiaosu, you can't cook?"

Du Xiaosu squatted down and smiled and said to her: "Sister Xiaosu still has a lot of things that she doesn't know, so you have to study hard. When you go to university and get a master's degree or PhD, you will know better than sister Xiaosu. More things, more capable than Xiaosu sister, then it will be your turn to teach me."

Mr. Sun took the opportunity to say: "Okay, class is about to go, everyone, go to the classroom."

The children went to class, and the kitchen became quiet. Du Xiaosu put away the rice bowls and soaked them in the basin. The water in the tank was gone, so Mr. Sun put the big tub in the yard to catch rainwater. The rain was so heavy that only the sound of "screaming" was heard, and the bushes and dwarf trees on the back mountain were blown to one side by the wind. There is a wooden barrel in front of the stove with a plastic basin buckled upside down with Pippi shrimp inside. The prawns were delivered on the boat yesterday. Teacher Xiaosun prepared to give everyone dinner that night. She opened it and looked at it. After raising it for a day, she was still alive and kicking. A prawn popped out all at once. When she wanted to catch it back, the shrimp hunched over and jumped all the way to the corner of the room. She followed after him. Suddenly a small black shadow came out and swept across the back of her instep. Du Xiaosu seemed to be taken aback. Later, I realized that it was a very small cat and threw the shrimp on. Unexpectedly, there was a thorn on the shrimp. The kitten was about to press on the thorn, and suddenly yelled "meow", leaped far and wide, tilted his round head, and looked at the shrimp. After a while, I tiptoed approached, stretched out his paws, and tentatively plucked the shrimp. The shrimp jumped hard and hit the kitten’s nose. The kitten was so scared that it whimpered and drilled. Under Du Xiaosu's legs, he shivered.

Du Xiaosu picked up the kitten. It was a small black and white tabby cat, softly curled into a ball in her palm, like a pompom, "meow".

She teased the kitten: "Mimi, what is your name? Seeing you are so thin, why not call it ribs."

In fact, the kitten is a bit like her. They have big round eyes and pointed faces. They look more alike when they look at people. They are always watery, like their eyes can talk.

The kitten stretched out her little pink tongue and licked her fingers. She burst into laughter: "Look, Zhenrong, it's so cute!"

He didn't speak, she probably really thought of him as Shao Zhenrong, on this small island.

It's probably because I really love and love so much that I'm so indulged and deceived like this.

The torrential rain outside, ringing in my ears, accompanied by the sloppy sound of children reading in the classroom, reading the not-so-standard Mandarin of Teacher Xiao Sun: "The stream of Wuyi Mountain It turned nine turns around the mountain, so it was called Jiuquxi. The stream was very clear, so clear that the sand and rocks at the bottom of the stream could be seen..." The voice was mixed in the wind and rain, and it seemed far and erratic. Du Xiaosu watched the thin white smoke rising from the heavy rain outside, which was blown up by the wind, like a white silk, wet wherever it was rolled. She couldn't help but feel a little worried: "What if I can't leave tomorrow?"

The wind and rain are so heavy, I'm afraid the ferry will stop.

Suddenly smiled at him again: "If we can't leave, let's stay on the island for two more days."

She always looked like tears before, but in fact she smiled very cutely, like a child, there is a kind of innocent and bright light between her eyebrows, like stars, which will leak sparsely and silently to people’s hearts. on. But the sound of wind and rain outside, a lot of noise, seems to isolate this island into another world.

In the evening, the wind finally subsided and the rain stopped. The children rushed out of the classroom and cheered on the small playground. Du Xiaosu took a camera and took countless photos of them. The little heads got together and looked at the small LED screen on the digital camera. The group photos were taken properly. The children surrounded him and Xiaosu. The bright smiles were like a bunch of the cutest flowers, but some The pictures were taken by Du Xiaosu. Children like to make faces at the camera. Of course, they look strange and make people laugh. Du Xiaosu was very patient. He brought out the photos one by one for everyone to see, making a group of children laugh from time to time.

The water in the water tank is almost gone. Teacher Xiaosun is going to pick up water. Du Xiaosu volunteered: "I'll go." Teacher Xiaosun scratched his head: "Then let Dr. Shao go with you. It’s hard to go, you can’t even mention it."

She was startled, Lei Yuzheng had already picked up the bucket: "Let's go."

I walked up the mountain to find out why Teacher Xiao Sun said the road was difficult to walk. The so-called road is nothing but a thin zigzag path on a steep mountain. The spring is very far away. There is a long stretch of road facing the cliff. Under the cliff, the waves hit the air. The rugged reef shattered the sea and rolled up. Thousands of piles of snow look dizzy. Du Xiaosu was already out of breath when he climbed to the top of the mountain, and the wind was so strong that all his hair was messed up. Standing on the top of the mountain, I can see the endless sea. The sea near me is turbid and yellowish, and the distance is very light blue. I can see small islands as far as I can see, like small hills in the sea of ​​clouds.

Large chunks of clouds were blown by the wind to move farther away, like countless sails competing for hair, and like countless huge seabirds, flying away. She opened her arms and felt the wind blow across her fingers. Lei Yuzheng stood there, staring at the sea and sky, as if his mind was washed away. The sky and the sea are so majestic and vast, and people are so small and weak. No matter how much trouble and pain in the world, they seem to be swallowed and obliterated by the sea and the sky.

There is such a magnificent scenery on this unknown island.

There was something fluffy sweeping his legs, and he looked down and saw that it was the kitten. I didn't know when to follow him, and he followed here. Mud had been splashed on the four small claws, but they swayed towards Du Xiaosu. She picked up the kitten and squatted by the spring to wash its paws. The spring water was very cold, and the ice made the kitten agitated, splashing drops of water on her face. Because of the cold, her cheeks were reddened by the sea breeze, and her skin was almost translucent, like morning rose flowers, with a crystal clear dew, she smiled brightly, as if flowers were blooming.

He squatted down to fetch water.

I only heard her say to the kitten: "Spare ribs, come home with us, there are so many delicious things at home."

He glanced lightly, and finally said: "You don't really intend to take it back, do you?"

Her appearance is vague: "Teacher Xiaosun said that the mother cat is dead, and the kitten has nothing to eat here. Maybe she will starve to death..."

"There are fish and shrimps here every day, why would you starve it to death?"

"But no one cooks for it."

He lifted up two full buckets of water: "Will you cook for it?"

She heard the ridicule in his statement, and her voice dropped: "I don't know how...but I can buy cat food..."

He carried the water down the mountain: "No pets are allowed on the plane."

She was taken aback, and chased after him: "Think of a way, can you help?"

He ignored her and walked carefully down the rugged mountain road.

She hugged the cat, followed him with one deep foot and one shallow foot, begging: "You see how pitiful the cat is, think of a way, you can even repair the generator..." Her voice was soft, pulling him "Zhenrong..."

Suddenly he stood up and said flatly: "I am not Shao Zhenrong."

She loosened her hand and the kitten jumped to the ground. She stared at him in a daze, as if she was suddenly awakened from a dream, still feeling embarrassed. The kitten rolled on the ground and was so muddy that he couldn't even see the color of his fur. He stuck out his tongue and kept licking his paws. He raised his head and called "meow" at him. One person and one cat were wide open. Looking at him, he seemed at a loss.

He continued to walk down the mountain with the bucket, she hugged the cat and followed him silently.

In the evening, he still cooked the rice. Because there was seaweed, he made seaweed and shrimp soup. The children were still eating very fragrantly, and Du Xiaosu served a bowl of soup and drank it silently. Teacher Xiao Sun was afraid that they had caught the cold, so he went to the kitchen to find a bottle of wine and came out: "Let’s drink a little tonight to avoid rheumatism."

The wine is shochu, soaked in sea cucumber, the taste is a bit strange.

Ms. Xiaosun originally wanted to drink two more glasses with Lei Yuzheng, but he was Lei Yuzheng’s opponent. After a few glasses of wine, his face has been flushed all the way to his neck, and he talked more: "Come on, kid We are happy, I am happy too... Dr. Shao, you and Ms. Du are really nice people. They have been sending money and buying books and sending them... I also have a girlfriend, but she doesn’t understand. She keeps saying that it’s too hard to be a teacher. If I don’t have the money, let me go to the mainland to work. But I’m leaving now, what to do with the dolls... No one will teach them... You and Miss Du, both of you have such good hearts..."

He was a little incoherent. Du Xiaosu took the bottle and poured him a glass of wine: "Teacher Sun, I respect you."

"Miss Du also have a little drink. This wine cures rheumatism. The island is very humid." Teacher Xiao Sun's red face, still a little shy with a smile, "This time you come, I didn't entertain you. You guys, it’s been so hard for you. Me and my children, I wish you a long life together."

Finally, after drinking a bottle of shochu, the generator stopped.

Ms. Xiaosun played a flashlight and went to the dormitory to take care of the children sleeping. Du Xiaosu was lying on the bed, and at first he vaguely heard Teacher Xiaosun talking to the child who was not asleep next door, and then he fell asleep and lost his voice.

A candle was lit in the room, and the candlelight flickered slightly.

Lei Yuzheng was still sleeping on the ground with her eyes closed. She was not sure if he was asleep, so she whispered to him: "Hey..."

He opened his eyes and looked at her.

"Sorry."

He closed his eyes again.

She said: "Thank you for making the children so happy these two days."

He was a little impatient and turned over: "Don't worry, it won't happen next time."

"I know I was wrong. I used to blame others, and thought I was strong. After Zhenrong left...I realized how cowardly I was. I feel unfair, how can I let Zhenrong go like that? Even I didn't have time to tell him...I hated myself. If I didn't talk about the breakup, maybe Zhenrong would not go to the disaster area. But now I know that even without me, Zhenrong would definitely go to the disaster area. Because he is so kind, he will definitely save people. If I really want to blame, I can only blame myself for not being lucky." Her voice slowly lowered, "Just like Teacher Xiao Sun, he never complained about others, he was the only one. People are on the island, teaching so many students, even to get some fresh water, they have to walk such rugged mountain roads. To teach, to take care of students’ lives, but there is not even a complaint...Compared with Teacher Xiaosun, and Compared with Zhenrong, I am so selfish and narrow..."

The sky outside is clear, and through the cracks of the wooden boards nailed to the windows, stars are seen, appearing on the black velvet sky.

The stars on the sea are big and bright, like eyes, looking down at her tenderly.

Will there be a star, Shao Zhenrong?

Will he also be in the sky, looking down at her tenderly like this?

She slowly closed her eyes: "Thank you for coming to the island with me."

After a long, long time she didn't speak any more, he finally turned his head and she was already asleep. The candle was burned to the end, the weak candlelight shook, and finally went out.

After a brief period of darkness, you can gradually see the sparse starlight leaking through the window. The sound of waves came in the distance, and the sea was beating against the sandy beach at the foot of the mountain.

She seems to be able to fall asleep quickly, without scheming, like a stream. Although winding and looming among the rocks, it is actually crystal clear and can be seen through at a glance.

When bidding farewell to the children, it was hard to separate. The fishing boat sailed far, far away, and I saw the rows of figures standing on the pier. They were too far apart, and I could only see the little blacks. Point, but stay in sight, stay in sight forever.

When they packed their bags in the morning, the students were very reluctant to leave. Two of the little girls shed tears, and she was also very sad.

She will never come again in the future. In a few years, the children will grow up, will go to middle school, will be more sensible, will leave the island, will go to university... Maybe the children will remember She, maybe the children will forget her after all. But in the future, she has to be alone, and she will never come here again. Because she and Zhen Rong have already been here, and she alone will never have a future. The sea grazed surgingly from the sight, the rushing waves splashed in the stern of the boat, and several points of sea water splashed on her face. The sea and the sky were so vast and boundless. The boat was as small as mustard seeds in the sea. For thousands of years, I don't know how many joys and sorrows the sea has seen, how many changes in the world have seen. Time will pass fast, from now on, her time alone.

The sea breeze is too strong and the boat undulates in the waves. Lei Yuzheng stood there, watching her squatting motionless on the side of the ship. It is estimated that all the food she ate in the morning had been vomited, but she still did not say a word, just like when she came, with a silent and stubborn look.

They rushed to the airport and took the latest flight back. Because it was getting late, the huge terminal was brightly lit, and only a few passengers were sitting in the terminal waiting to board the plane.

Although she had been busy all day, she just sat there in silence, like a quiet doll.

He finally took a business card of his own, handed it to her, and said, "Is there anything I can call this phone."

In fact, what he wanted to say was that he could return the house to her, but he didn't know why, and he couldn't say it again.

She took the business card: "Thank you."

He didn't speak any more.

"Zhenrong is gone." She lowered her eyes, "I won't trouble you again."

After Du Xiaosu came back, Zou Siqi felt very strange, because after returning from the island, she seemed to be cheerful again. He even smiled occasionally, and when he mentioned Shao Zhenrong, he was very calm, no longer as vulnerable as he used to be. Only Du Xiaosu knew that those few days on the island were like stolen time. The small island is like a paradise, only the clear eyes of the children. They are naive, but sensible, live hard, study hard, and even Teacher Xiao Sun has an unimaginable strength. In this world, she will live well, because Zhenrong hopes, because the parents who love her hope, and the people who love her hope.

So, she mustered up the courage to go to work.

Some colleagues still look at her with strange eyes, but she is no longer discouraged, and she no longer pays attention to rumors about herself. She works hard and goes all out without any frustration or distraction. After a week, there will be obvious results. Such a situation and attitude immediately won the trust of most of my colleagues. After all, performance proves everything. Shan Wanting, Lei Yuzheng's secretary, re-expressed the keys to her. When she got the keys, she almost lost her joy. Gains and losses, and losses and gains, but no matter what, she is still very fortunate to be able to get back the house between herself and Zhen Rong.


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