Celestial Employee Chapter 1: The child said on the toilet
"MLGBD." Zhao Lingjun, who was sitting on the toilet, couldn't help but cursed.
Through the glass window of the bathroom, Zhao Lingjun saw the asphalt on the road steaming, the air seemed to be thick and became like melted chocolate, and there was no wind in the sky. , Even the leaves of the sun-dried plane trees on both sides of the road were drooping, and they didn't move.
In the past June, the weather was still very cool, but the weather this year was uncharacteristically normal. God didn’t know what medicine was wrong. It was only after June that the temperature soared. It is even more outrageous today, the highest temperature is directly 38 degrees. On the way to and from get off work, Zhao Lingjun felt that he was about to be dried up.
If it's just that, then forget it. But when Zhao Lingjun returned to his nest, he found that the entire community, without knowing what went wrong, had all power outages.
After Zhao Lingjun picked up his cell phone and made countless complaint calls, he finally had to enter his own stuffy room. The heat wave in the room made Zhao Lingjun almost fainted. Just when Zhao Lingjun decided to go out and find a place to cool off, Zhao Lingjun's stomach hurts like a knife.
When he rushed to the bathroom and sat on the toilet, Zhao Lingjun wanted to come to the bowl of beef ramen noodles that he had for dinner at a street stall before returning. At that time, Zhao Lingjun thought that the beef ramen taste was a bit strange, but Zhao Lingjun thought that the owner of beef ramen had introduced a new flavor, and he enjoyed it.
In the next ten minutes, Zhao Lingjun sat on the toilet and almost fainted. When he finally finished pulling, Zhao Lingjun discovered a very serious problem.
That was when Zhao Lingjun found out that he had run out of toilet paper in his bathroom.
I didn't bring toilet paper to deal with. As early as the first year of college, Zhao Lingjun had several ways to deal with it. For example, I yelled, who borrowed a piece of paper from me, or asked other students who came to the toilet to do good deeds and help bring two toilet papers. But at this time, Zhao Lingjun understood that there were only two applicable methods.
The first thing that Zhao Lingjun wanted to use was the first one, which is more disgusting but more economical. And it is relatively clean, without any side effects. So Zhao Lingjun opened the lid of the water tank on the toilet, trying to get some water out of it to flush his ass. But at first glance, Zhao Lingjun almost fainted.
There is almost no water in the toilet. It turned out that today's community is not only power-off, but also water. When he first entered the bathroom, Zhao Lingjun habitually flushed the toilet first.
After the first plan failed, Zhao Lingjun began to implement the second plan. This second option was tried by roommates in Zhao Lingjun's university. At that time, Zhao Lingjun's roommate used ten water tickets to solve the problem that now plagues Zhao Lingjun. It's just that Zhao Lingjun has graduated for nearly a year now, and those cheap water tickets have disappeared like the girls in the Industrial and Commercial School that Zhao Lingjun secretly loved.
So when he took out his wallet, Zhao Lingjun hoped that he could find some expired invoices in his wallet. If it didn't work, he would use the five yuan.
But wait for Zhao Lingjun to take out his wallet and have a look. Zhao Lingjun, who thought he was a highly educated and civilized man, could not help but cursed, "MLGBD."
Originally, Zhao Lingjun’s wallet usually contains some expired invoices, discount coupons issued by some merchants, and so on, but today, Zhao Lingjun’s wallet does not contain those things.
And what drove Zhao Lingjun mad the most was that the smallest denomination bill in Zhao Lingjun's wallet today turned out to be fifty.
Sometimes, people are unlucky, and if they drink cold water, they will stuff their teeth. Zhao Lingjun thought sadly while doing nasty things with fifty banknotes.
"One day's salary, I got it, and it's gone."
When he came out of the bathroom with his trousers, Zhao Lingjun wanted to carry the knife to the competent unit of the water and electricity department desperately. But at this time, Zhao Lingjun suddenly heard a lot of people making noise, as if calling his own name.
"Mr Zhao Ling...Mr Zhao Ling...come down soon."
Zhao Lingjun took a look and realized that he was not hallucinating because of excessive grief and anger. Many people were calling their names downstairs in one of their buildings.
"What the **** is going on?" Zhao Lingjun thought as he went downstairs anxiously, "Did they smell something? Knowing that I was finished, there was no water to flush the toilet? Or I knew I had no toilet paper just now. Did you wipe your **** with fifty dollars?"
*
"Why are you so slow, you only got off now." A fat guy said to Zhao Lingjun very angry.
"MLGBD, I can go wherever I want, hurry up and slow down, you are in charge of you." Zhao Lingjun wanted to say that first, and then kicked the fat man in front of him like a trash can. , People can think of a bunch of chubby, unprepared, greasy, nauseous braised pork like wretched men kicking away. But after Zhao Lingjun took a deep breath, he forced himself to show a spring-like smile at this man who made him nauseous to the extreme, and shouted at the fat man with a voice that made him get goosebumps, " Mr. Zhang."
The name of the fat man named Mr. Zhang by Zhao Lingjun is Zhang Zhong. Like his name, he is really heavy. The weight of nearly two hundred catties is estimated to crush Zhao Lingjun alive. But the reason why Zhao Lingjun didn't dare to kick one foot away was because this guy and Zhao Lingjun worked in the same company, and his level was three levels higher than Zhao Lingjun, and he had a nickname "Boiler Worker" well known throughout the company.
Zhang Zhong's identity in the company is the manager of the personnel department. In his hands, he has a lot of power. Of course, he is not a boiler worker. The reason why he has such a nickname is because his characteristic is to fan the flames.
A big thing, he can talk about 9/11 in front of the general manager. Arriving a minute late, speaking in his mouth, will have the same impact as a day's absence from work.
In short, this fat man is a person who is hated by everyone in the company, and everyone wants to hang him alive. It is estimated that since the establishment of the company, countless people have tried to pull this man out of their hearts. The idea of sky lanterns.
To tell the truth, everyone in the company knows that Zhang Zhong has no other talent except to fan the flames and make small reports. But up to now, Zhang Zhong is still alive and well. And it's alive and moisturizing than anyone else. And all those who offended him, none of them seemed to end well.
There is only one reason, because Zhang Zhong happens to be the brother-in-law of the general manager.
"What happened~ IndoMTL.com~ Zhao Lingjun tried his best to keep himself from showing the slightest disgust for this guy.
"It's incredible." A voice that seemed to be smeared with honey sounded in Zhao Lingjun's ear. In the sultry weather in June, Zhao Lingjun felt that there was honey flowing on his body.
"The hole in the house is blocked, you poke me." It was still the voice that seemed to be smeared with honey, which made people feel sticky.
If such a voice rang at a certain voice telephone station, it is very likely that the man who heard the voice had already secreted hormones quickly and was going to prepare toilet paper. Zhao Lingjun has always believed that if it weren't for face-to-face naked video chat, which is not popular nowadays, voice calls are no longer popular, the owner of this voice has already been popular for a long time and has become the top celebrity of a certain audio channel.
But now Zhao Lingjun hears this voice and only feels that his eyes are dark, Zhao Lingjun feels that he may be scattered at any time.
Because of the face of the owner of this voice, Zhao Lingjun has long been unforgettable.
The billowing heat and this honey-like voice on the concrete floor downstairs made Zhao Lingjun, who was in a trance, felt like he was back in July of last year when he heard this voice.