Divine Doctor: Daughter of the First Wife Chapter 1198: You can no longer have hope
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Xuan Tianyan came to Feng Fendai's place not once or twice, but Feng Fendai didn't know it. Most of the time, Xuan Tianyan comes in the middle of the night and leaves before dawn. Therefore, he knows that Feng Fendai has been suffering from insomnia recently. She is always unable to fall asleep in the middle of the night. She is either walking around the yard or sitting with her knees in the house. Just sit there all night. He felt very sorry for Feng Fendai, and wanted to go forward and hug her several times, but he felt that that girl had nothing to do with him anymore, and he was just asking for shame by showing up.
Tonight he came again because he heard from Qi Fang that someone had scolded Feng Fendai for two days and nights when he took in his concubine a few days ago. He thought, with Feng Fendai's temperament, he might be angry! But when he came over to take a look, he saw Feng Fendai still sitting quietly in the room as usual, with a calm face and no sign of anger at all.
He thought again, maybe a few days had passed and his anger had subsided? But that's not right. With Feng Fendai's temper, it's not possible to get rid of her anger so easily. Normally, it would take a month of continuous scolding to get over it. He deliberately came earlier, before falling asleep, because he wanted to see the girl's condition, and also wanted to hear Feng Fendai's reaction after learning that he had taken in another concubine.
However, nothing could be seen. Feng Fendai acted as if she had never experienced those things. She had no reaction and just lived quietly.
It's just that Xuan Tianyan still sensed that something was wrong. He didn't come here during the period a year ago. When he came before, it was mostly late at night, and he couldn't see the life in this yard. Today came a little early, and during the Chinese New Year, people slept late. When he came, he happened to see Dongying feeding Xiaobao. It was half a bowl of steamed pork, which had obviously been eaten and heated. Xiaobao ate each bite happily, and from time to time he persuaded Fendai to eat some too. But Fendai didn't eat, just sat there quietly and watched.
Later, when Xiaobao finished his meal and went back to sleep, he heard Dongying say to Fendai: "Miss, I only ate half a bowl of noodles at night. How about I make you something to eat! This young master of steamed pork I can’t finish it. There is some rice left in the kitchen. My servant will heat it up for you. Can you eat some more with this steamed meat?”
Fendai shook her head and said: "Forget it, I'm not hungry. I'll keep the meat if I can't finish it. It won't go bad in the winter. What if the child still wants to eat it tomorrow! We can't let that child follow the Chinese New Year. We are both vegetarians. Tomorrow you can cook the remaining meat in a different way and put some dried vegetables in it. Xiaobao likes it."
Dong Ying was a little helpless, "It's a pity that we can't afford a cook. How can I cook? This bowl of steamed pork is just put in some salt. Maybe the young master doesn't like it. Otherwise... or we Invite a cook? It doesn’t matter how skilled she is, just a woman who can cook. How can the food be better than the food cooked by the servants?"
But Fendai waved her hand, "No, even an ordinary woman needs to be given half a tael of silver a month. We can buy a lot of things with that half a tael. Just for food, it's almost enough for a month!"
After hearing this, Dongying said nothing more. After finishing Fendai's affairs, she went back to accompany Xiaobao. Xuan Tianyan felt particularly uncomfortable listening to the conversation between the master and the servant. If he had known that this girl was living so hard now, he should have left more money for her when they separated.
Xuan Tianyan felt distressed, but now that the two of them were in such trouble, even if he wanted to give it to her, Feng Fendai would not take it. He had no choice but to hide in the corner of the yard, watching Fendai silently as usual, and left quietly before dawn.
It can be regarded as spending a year with her! Xuan Tianyan thought that on the night of the first day of the new year, he was with her at least, so he would not let the girl live alone. Now she is the only one in the Feng family who is still in the capital. This girl has a bad temper. She is always unwilling to reconcile with Feng Yuheng and Feng Xiangrong, and she is always unwilling to say soft words. If she can have those two sisters by her side, he It can also give you some peace of mind. How can he feel at ease like this?
At dawn, Xuan Tianyan left, and Feng Fendai stood up from the chair. Her feet were a little numb, and it took her a while to stabilize herself before she could take a few steps. When she walked out of the house, the person who secretly watched her was gone in the yard, and even her breath was blown away by the cold winter wind. Feng Fendai didn't actually see Xuan Tianyan coming, but she just had a feeling that just last night, in a corner of the yard, there was a person standing there quietly watching, and it seemed like he had stayed there all night. . She wanted to come out and take a look, but her feet touched the ground, but she took them back. She knew that it was Xuan Tianyan. In this capital, Xuan Tianyan was the only person who could remember secretly looking at her. But so what? Now they each have their own lives, and she lives quietly in this small courtyard without fighting against the world. He also brings women into his house one after another with great fanfare, and continues his life as an absurd prince. Everyone has their own choice, but there should be no intersection between them.
Fendai sat down in the yard. The stone bench that had been cold all night made her shiver, and her whole body felt cold. But she didn't get up, and let the coldness spread until her fingertips were cold, and Dongying came. Then she said to Dongying who persuaded her to go back to sit in the room: "It doesn't matter, just be cooler." Okay, having a clear mind can help me distinguish who is right from wrong, and what kind of life I should have."
She is very satisfied with her current situation, although she is a little poorer, although the money at the bottom of her wallet is about to be empty, although she will soon have to find a way to make a living to keep her life going. But Feng Fendai thought that even if she remained so poor, her life would be much better than before in Feng Mansion. She couldn't understand why she liked fighting so much in the past, and why she cared so much about the position of a legitimate daughter of the Feng family. Looking back now, what if she became the legitimate daughter of the Feng family? Now that the Feng family is gone, she is just the legitimate daughter of a broken family. She will never become another Feng Yuheng. After all, she didn't have the ability like Feng Yuheng, nor the good temperament like Feng Xiangrong, nor could she be far-sighted. She was on the wrong team from the beginning, and now she has no relatives or friends.
But so what? She smiled, and there was Xiaobao! No matter who the biological father of that child is, the mother is always Han, her biological brother.
"It feels so good to have a relative by my side." She smiled at Dongying, but the smile only lasted for a moment, and soon dimmed again. She said to Dongying: "After this year, I will return the deed of betrayal to you. You can go! You don't have to wait on me anymore and find a good-tempered master to follow. At least you don't have to be like now, without food for ten days." A mouthful of meat."
Dong Ying was stunned, Feng Fendai was willing to return the deed of betrayal to her? This was what she had dreamed of! This Miss Fengsi had a bad temper and was very unstable. She always beat and scolded her. She once wanted to get back the contract of sale and be free. She once thought that no matter what kind of master she got, she would be better than Feng Fendai. of.
But now, when Feng Fendai really said that she wanted to return the deed of betrayal to her, Dongying was at a loss. He also forgot to be happy. Instead, he froze in place with a sore nose. Suddenly she felt that she didn't want to leave. She didn't really want to abandon Feng Fendai and start a new life. She was used to following Feng Fendai. Her life had been completely integrated with the Feng family and Feng Fendai. Leaving is like being kicked out of the house by your parents, and I feel uncomfortable.
She shook her head and said to Feng Fendai: "I don't want to leave. If the young lady wants to save money, then there is no need to drive me away. I don't want the money and just want to accompany the young lady and the young master. Life is hard now." But that’s nothing. What hardships can a servant have to bear? You, a eldest lady, can live such a life, so why can’t I be a slave? Besides, when times were good in the past, the lady never treated my slaves badly. It’s delicious. The slave has tasted the good drinks and good clothes, and has no regrets in this life. Miss, you don’t have to worry about the future. The slave has already thought about it. After the Chinese New Year, the slave will go out to do some needlework. If you can’t make more, why not make less? , we, who live in ordinary life, can at least have enough to eat."
After she finished speaking, without waiting for Feng Fendai to reply, she turned around and went into the house. When she came out again, she brought a cloak to cover Fendai. Fendai was stunned, "This cloak is made of fox fur and is worth a lot of money. I remember asking you to take it out to pawn. Why is it still there?"
Dong Ying sighed softly, "I'm not willing to give it up. The things that the young lady brought out from Feng Mansion were not many. You have always liked this cloak. We can still live now. There is no need to sell it for money." ."
Fendai was stunned for a while, then reached out to touch the cloak. The snow-white fox fur was a birthday gift given to her by Feng Jinyuan when the Feng family was prosperous. She was still young at that time, almost nine years old, her stature was not as promising as it is now, and her cloak now looked stingy. But she has always treasured it tightly and is reluctant to use it. Her fur is still shining and very beautiful.
This was the only time Feng Jinyuan gave her such a good thing, and it was Han who helped her beg for it after coaxing and making trouble. In the eyes of that father, there was always only the incredibly beautiful Feng Chenyu. In his eyes, the other daughters were just stones to pave the way for Chen Yu. Now, those once glorious people are dead, but she survived. Thinking about it this way, Feng Yuheng was quite good to her. At least she was the only one left alive among those who had ever been against her.
Feng Fendai smiled bitterly. If she had known that her mood would change like this today, she should not have done anything against her will for a legitimate daughter. However, there is no medicine for regret in the world. The principles that we understand now are all obtained by the mistakes we made at the beginning. Time cannot be reversed, and everything cannot be taken back.
"My hope is gone," she murmured softly, "Second sister, I can't let you have no hope anymore. Come back quickly! I always feel that this capital is not as peaceful as it seems!"