Hollywood Domination Chapter 317: The first night of living together (Part 2)

It can be seen that Cesare felt the inappropriateness of his remarks just like her just now——Jenny's sudden depression seemed to make him mistakenly think that his question hurt her, and this made him fall into a There was a dignified silence: it was clear that Cesare was not very good at handling emotionally awkward situations like this. The cautiousness and bewilderment revealed on his statue-like frozen face almost made Jenny feel guilty after recovering from some unpleasant memories. It is true that she is not in a good mood now, but this It is definitely not the feeling caused by Cesare's question, and even less the feeling caused by the current situation.

"I think it's really sad," she said affirmatively, "because it's a sign of incompetence, as we've just been discussing—the reason we're doing this is because We don't have the ability to get the results we want while keeping ourselves safe, so we have to be harsh on ourselves... In fact, almost all marriages that are not based on love have such a basis, all political marriages, and all marriages that are born out of impending , all the nugget girls when they marry the old gold mine - I think she will feel the same frustration and anxiety, and I think we are less sad, because it is a short-term marriage after all, not like It's a political marriage that lasts a lifetime, and it's not like those women who still have hope for love, but have to marry age, and marry the reality of 'wanting children, but can't raise them independently', must face their own failures , not like a gold nugget girl, in order to change her situation and destiny, she had to deceive others, betray herself, desperately chasing every opportunity to change her destiny, and even sincerely hypnotized herself in order to hide her incompetence , let myself believe that there is really love in this marriage..."

She realized that her voice was a bit too high-pitched and exaggerated, so she quickly restrained her emotions, and after calming down, she continued, "Compared with them, at least we still have the initiative-we are pursuing more It’s not that basic, we’re not that incompetent.”

Cesare was silent for a while, he looked at Jenny with a strange look, as if she was showing a brand new side - a person who had never been shown in front of anyone, at least completely unfamiliar to her On the one hand, after a while, he said slowly, "Indeed, what really brought about this marriage was not our fear of losing money—"

Of course, when Cesare proposed to transfer property by marriage, they did it for money--for a large sum of money, to make up for previous mistakes, but after the situation escalated, when they were targeted by the irs Later, when Jenny chose to continue the marriage with a high profile, money was indeed not the first factor they considered. Jenny nodded, "This is what I wanted to correct you just now, your image - your image as a CEO, the influence of the company, potential enemies, this is what we value, this is what we need to pass a marriage to solve problems, and not because we need money... money is no longer a problem for you and me now, Cesare, what really matters is what we want to do, what we want to do through big The ideals that dreams come true, the heights we want to reach—what really matters is the pursuit of excellence—”

"Pursuit of excellence, always pursuit." Cesare said, his expression calmed down, as if there was a burden—one that hadn't been shown, but was always there, secretly in their communication. Adding hindrances, creating awkward burdens, and disappearing quietly made him seem so much more serene—it wasn't until now that you realized how tense he was before.

"Yes, that's the point, the exchange for money and survival, sad," said Jenny, raising her hand in a gesture, "an exchange based on deceit, sad, an exchange without end, sad, these All sad as is a hasty marriage that ends up with a painful and messy outcome that affects the lives of many around it. But in exchange for excellence, like you said, a clean, friendly, tacit cooperation , is it sad? It may still be sad, but it is also respectable at the same time, at least it is sad for successful people, and it is only one step away from greatness.”

"Do you think so highly of yourself?" Cesare said, he actually smiled and stretched his legs against the back of the chair, "It's only one step away from greatness? Huh?"

"If what we're after is not the individual center," said Jenny, "but the group center, I don't know -- I guess if your ambition is to protect wildlife, in order to raise enough money Tilt with the policy, build a protected area, you and I agree to marry—think about it, if this is the case—"

Cesare thought for a while, and then laughed out loud. He leaned his neck on the back of the chair, let out a chuckle towards the roof, and stretched out his hands to grab the blond hair.

"It sounds like it's going to be a good movie, I guess, the typical arthouse movie, mixed with some sexual obfuscation, thinking, and the humbleness and greatness of human nature, and things like that," he laughs. But, back to the point, I see what you mean - yes, if we are married for this fake marriage, then we are great."

"It's sad at the same time," Jenny added, "at least in the eyes of those who insist on marrying for love, we are great and sad. But I guess we will feel better when we get married that way. ——At least it’s better than getting married for a film company.”

"And marrying for a movie company and everything it stands for is much better than marrying for survival, for money—or out of nowhere, for illusory political needs." Cesare said Slightly sarcastic—and self-deprecating, “much less pathetic — Ulla.”

"It's hard for you to imagine." Jenny was not interested in Cesare, she shook her head and said in a low voice, "It's like sacrificing a marriage, those who want to change their destiny and get out of despair , What kind of mood would it be to stand in front of the altar... You can't imagine how much difference there is between her life and our life-it's not about money, but... You can't imagine that she has How ignorant and ignorant, how helpless and struggling, how weak...Maybe you can chat and laugh with her, maybe you often pass by, but you can't understand each other at all, you won't understand what money means to her Why is it so important - for you, money is the last thing in the world to worry about, you have too many ways to get it, and she, she doesn't understand your world, she doesn't even understand her own Incompetent and humble, and complacent about his achievements, like..."

She glanced at Cesare, and said without hesitation, "Just like you at certain times, she would let me... Now I can't help but feel sorry for her..."

Cesare fell silent, but did not show a stinging expression. Tonight seems to be a wonderful night. There are so many sensitive topics being mentioned, and each topic needs to be treated carefully. It can even be said that Not to mention, and they had such bold discussions and expressed such sharp attitudes on these topics, but no one was hurt by it, as if at this moment, whether it was the not-so-glorious past or the inherent character The flaws and knots that are hard to let go are not weaknesses that can be used to attack oneself, not hidden pains that need to be guarded against, but imperfections that can be admitted frankly, and can be implicitly made up for in discussions—perhaps not once Sex can be solved, it cannot be cured, but the pain can still be relieved, and the wound can still be cared for. In this kind of discussion, you can believe that the world is developing towards the good side after all, and you no longer need to stay strong forever. In the world, there is always a place where you can put down your guard and tinker. You will believe that the world is not just a never-ending storm again and again. You will believe that you can reach the oasis during the journey. There is a place waiting, maybe it is not heaven, but there are always one or two places that will be as you expect.

"So, from a certain point of view, sacrificing for the pursuit of excellence is already a kind of success in itself." In the end, Cesare still did not take the initiative to ask anything, but concluded softly, "——If this is Self-consolation, then I have to say, you did a good job."

"At least I would rather choose to sacrifice a marriage in pursuit of excellence." Jenny replied without hesitation, "If I had to choose, yes, I would."

She couldn't help but smiled, "Looking at it this way, my progress is indeed not small - when I stood in front of the altar this time, the uncomfortable feeling can almost be called happiness, Come to think of it, maybe by the time I got married for the third time, I was really getting married for all of humanity—for a great cause.”

"By then, the discomfort should have been quite mild," Cesare said teasingly, "If there is such a time, I think you should get used to it no matter what."

"I think it should be so." Jenny also laughed, "But I know that even then, there will be people who will feel sorry for me——Lilian will definitely feel sorry for me."

"Yes, Lilian will definitely." Cesare's face softened, and at this moment, his voice could almost be described as soft, "Lilian is the conscience of this society."

"And us?" Jenny asked, "What about people like us?"

"People like us are the wheels of human civilization." Cesare said, "the smaller ones, you know, our purpose is not so noble after all, but anyway, I think, it is the success Thousands of us are driving society forward, perhaps towards destruction—but anyway, without us, the world will definitely change much more slowly.”

"Sounds really exciting," Jenny put the last piece of broccoli in her mouth, "just think of me as self-soothing--I'm actually quite glad I am, I think, and Lily Ambi, at least my life will be much more exciting."

Cesare laughed, he stood up and began to pack the dishes, "So, this is the first dinner in the new family - a philosophical dialogue with no output and practical significance."

"If you think this is philosophy," Jenny stood up to get a kitchen towel, "then your college grades must not be as good as I thought-and it is not without practical significance, at least it makes my happiness Empty mansions, impending weddings—it doesn’t feel so unbearable anymore, does it? These are our choices—after all, it’s the price of excellence.”

"So, you've successfully completed a self-hypnosis," Cesare said, bending down to study the dishwasher, while Jenny rolled her eyes at his back.

"I find that you are really annoying sometimes--" She wiped the dirt on the table back and forth, roughly tidied up the dishes used in the cooking, and then saw that Cesare hadn't Standing up, they walked to him and squatted down together. "Is something wrong?"

"I'm a little unsure if it's plugged in," Cesare said, "The panel isn't lit, but—"

As he leaned to the right, Jenny noticed what seemed to be a socket on the left, and the two almost collided, and Cesare had to hold her shoulders with both hands to help her maintain her balance.

Maybe because the food they eat is different in temperature, the temperature of his palm is obviously different from that of Jenny's skin, the strength of his grasp, the familiar, slightly sea salt-flavored men's perfume - that familiar sense of tension She came back again, but this time, Jenny found that she was no longer so embarrassed and scared. She didn't know what Cesare's words made her subconsciously let her guard down. Threatened to revolt, but now, her instincts no longer drove her to escape.

They looked at each other—maybe it took a little longer than usual to meet eyes—but they laughed almost at the same time, dissolving the momentary tension, and Jenny said, "The socket seems to be on the left, look No, under the wall covered by that rag..."

Soon, the LCD panel of the dishwasher lit up, Cesare set the timer for the coffee machine, and he and Jenny filed out of the kitchen.

"How did you feel about the meal?" He was a little more talkative than usual.

"I think I need a full-time salad cook," said Jenny, as they headed up the stairs together, "the broccoli smells like blood—it shouldn't go in the water after the chicken...how about you?"

"I wanted to treat you to a little pasta—even a bite," Cesare said with rare embarrassment. "A little carbohydrate is harmless to fitness—but I finally gave up on that idea."

It's nothing funny, but Jenny couldn't help but started laughing, she said almost at the same time as Cesare, "So, we do need a chef—"

"So, I gotta start learning how to cook—"

It's really not funny, but for some reason, Jenny's laughter became louder, and Cesare also started shaking his head and chuckling, and he stopped at the corner of the second floor. "Good night, Jenny, see you tomorrow."

Jenny walked up to the third floor while smiling, "Good night ie, see you tomorrow."

Climb up the steps, turn on the porch light, walk to the end of the corridor, look at the dark sea, close the window against the strong night wind, and then walk through a long corridor—on the other side of the corridor is her The cloakroom, came to the dark master bedroom, turned on the lights, walked into the empty big room, looked around the strange environment——

All this should have made her feel uneasy and frightened, but Jenny feels really good now, her thoughts have gotten rid of the temporary low ebb, and she has waved her wings to go to a higher and farther place, she is thinking about her future A literary film - inspired by her unintentional metaphors and Cesare's teasing, she has a feeling that if she goes down this road, maybe she will find the film she wants to make: Regardless of box office, Regardless of awards, just the movie she wants to act in; she is thinking about her past, her long-forgotten girlhood; she is thinking about the dinner just now, thinking about Cesare's words, "If you can't put your lover before your career , then it is better to give up pursuing the 'white fence' type of marriage", which made her think of Daniel Day-Lewis and his wife, and she wanted to know who was more selfish, Cesare or Daniel - maybe Cesare One day he meets a girl who can sacrifice for him like Rebecca, and it will change his life dramatically...

She was thinking of her future, of her two marriages—for the first time in so many years, Jenny thought vaguely of the question, of her third marriage—she Having been married twice for different reasons, will she marry a third time? Will she meet a man who makes her want to step into church? Admittedly, as Cesare said, all this is not so logical, especially for her, it is even more impossible to get married naturally at the age when most people get married. Marriage requires struggle, hard work and sacrifice. It also means predictable wonderful stories, endless external factors and multiple games-marriage and everything after that must also mean suspension and distraction in career, and swing and turmoil in the balance of power-what will she do? choose? Just like Cesare, just give up looking forward, or secretly hope that you can have Daniel's luck, and fall in love with your real man at first sight?

Maybe... Maybe she still has some hazy longing for marriage—of course it's not the fake marriage between her and Cesare, or the kind of marriage between her and her ex-husband—but a real marriage, born of love. The kind that is concluded—however, this leads to another problem——

She's about to get married for the second time, and already has several boyfriends, and maybe some crushes, but has she... ever really loved anyone? The hazy first love, ex-husband, Chris, Salvi... Is the relationship between these people and her really considered love...

Before she knew it, Jenny walked to the window and looked at the garden through the glass. A beam of pale yellow light, dust and bugs danced up and down in the light, and cast it along a straight line towards the thick blackness of the distant cliff.

"Maybe we can grow some herbs in the garden..." A strange idea suddenly jumped into my mind, practical and interesting, and the planting talent from the East squeezed out all the metaphysics. "Thyme, rosemary, etc., can repel insects, and can be used for cooking - I have always wanted to grow something, but unfortunately the previous villa was really not suitable - tonight's meat sauce will definitely be more fragrant with a little tarragon... ..."

Her stomach seemed to squirm, Jenny swallowed her saliva, and turned to get her yoga clothes, "A little carbohydrate is really harmless, next time... I must eat a bite next time..."