One Punch Man King Engine: Concluding remarks
Clap! !
A round of applause broke out from the stage.
"Welcome to the interviews with the famous Chinese Literature Group, I'm your old friend - start small."
On the stage is the arrangement of a traditional talk show, a small table, two chairs, a little bit wearing a consistent penguin headgear, holding the host's hand card, and quickly reciting: "This show is organized by Alibaba, Sponsored by Wanda Group, Shanda Entertainment and Perfect World..."
Clap!
There was another round of applause from the audience.
"Then, let's invite our guest today, the famous writer - I am Beibi."
Clap!
It was still a steady applause.
"Hello everyone, I'm Beibi..."
A particularly handsome guy walked quickly onto the stage with a warm smile.
"Hello host."
"Hello Beibi."
The two sat down after saying hello.
He said politely, "Beibi, you may not be familiar with you, why don't you introduce yourself?"
"Introduce yourself?"
Beibi looked at the audience off stage, smiling.
I am Beibi, one of the writers under the China Reading Group, and also one of the five handsome people in the reading group. The third handsome man in Wen - Beibi, the fourth handsome man in reading - I am Beibi, and the last one is me.
Book lovers often say that the handsomeness of the five handsome men is indistinguishable from each other.
The eyes of the masses are sharp, so I will not refute it.
As such a well-known and handsome writer, of course I can't be invited by ordinary programs, but the first shot is "50,000 words to sign a contract, 100,000 words to test the water, and 200,000 words to put on the shelves" The perfect condition is too generous.
Because the hospitality was difficult, I reluctantly agreed.
Because I seem to see the peak moment of my writing career, hehehehe...
He got a little excited just thinking about it!
"Ahem..."
Beibi put away his messy thoughts, coughed dryly, and prepared to introduce himself according to the script, "Hello everyone, I'm..."
However, he just opened his mouth...
"Thank you for introducing yourself."
Start with a small applause and thank you.
"This..."
Beibi froze for a while and stared at a small dot. What do you mean by interrupting me when I introduce myself?
Clap! !
There was a burst of applause from the audience.
Hoohoo, keep your image in front of the audience, keep your image, after all, the audience is applauded, obviously the audience likes me very much, of course I can't let the audience down...
He took a deep breath, suppressed the anger in his heart, glanced at the audience, his eyes froze suddenly, wait a minute, what the **** is under the stage?
There are ten audience chairs under the stage, and only one uncle in work clothes and a work card holds a radio. Whenever applause is needed, the uncle presses it, and then a burst of mechanized applause comes out.
Oh shit, this **** show is so rudimentary, dare you say it is the most popular column under China Literature?
Ah!
I feel like I've been tricked into a wolf's den, no, I have to go!
Beibi's face tightened, he stood up with a sigh, turned around and was about to leave.
Pfft!
With a small eye, he quickly grabbed Shelly's arm.
"Huh?"
Beibi glanced at it disdainfully. Even if the conditions of this kind of bad show are good, as a famous artist, I will not continue to stay. After all, I am also shameful.
A little bit and whispered: "New book category strongly recommended!!"
Clap!
Beibi sat down again. Of course, he didn't stay because of some default recommendation, but felt that people should be honest. Since he agreed to be interviewed in advance, he should not regret it.
"Very good, the self-introduction has been completed, please finish this testimonial!"
Said with a little enthusiasm.
"No problem, no problem..."
Beibi smiled and nodded, secretly recalling his prepared speech:
First of all, I would like to thank China Literature Group for giving me a stage to display my talents, and then I would like to thank my editor, Ruo Ye Ju, for supporting me in the days when I continued to cut off updates. Well, no, Ruo Ye Ju did not support me. Instead of changing, I didn't give up my salted fish... Omit a million words.
Simply put, my gratitude to Ruo Yeju is like a surging river, never ending.
"Very good, very good, thank you Beibi for your complete testimonial."
Small and clapping thanks.
Clap!
The uncle in the audience watched his words, and immediately pressed the button. The applause sounded, and the audience roared.
Wait a minute, what the hell? I just typed the draft in my mind. Where did I finish this testimonial? are you kidding me?
Beibi glared a little, this penguin is too shameless, no, I have to go.
With a swipe, he stands up again and prepares to retreat.
Pfft!
With a little bit of eyes and a quick hand, I grabbed Shelly's arm again.
"Huh?"
Beibi glanced at it disdainfully. Even if the conditions of this kind of bad show are good, as a famous artist, I will not continue to stay. After all, I am also shameful.
A little bit and said in a low voice: "Recommended by Sanjiang for a new book!!"
Clap!
Beibi sat down again. Of course, it was explained in advance that he didn't stay because of some default recommendation. After all, he didn't understand what Sanjiang recommended. He just felt it from the small matter of "adding money". I was deeply moved by the sincerity of the other party, so I stayed to continue the interview.
Phew, calm down, I'm going to maintain my celebrity demeanor!
He smiled slightly, "Hello host, please continue to ask me questions!"
Qiaodian stared at the hand card and said truthfully: "Okay, Beibi, as a famous artist, you have dozens or hundreds of fans. Before the start of the column, we have already issued a notice that you are going to be on our show. Collect the questions your fans want to ask you, then next, I will ask you questions on behalf of your hundreds of fans, I hope you can answer them sincerely."
What the **** are tens of thousands of fans? Wouldn't it be okay to write general terms like "a lot", "many" and "a multitude"? Am I handsome and shameless?
Beibi felt depressed for a while.
"The first question, Beibi, your writing is so bad, are you eating shit?"
“…”
Beibi is silent, Nima, are you sure this is a fan? Black powder is also powder? Can you be serious about the selection of your program groups? Are you going to **** me off?
Clap clap clap!
The uncle in the audience pressed the applause button.
Applause your sister, is this the time to applaud?
Bee nearly exploded.
"Ha, the first question is a little embarrassing, let's skip it." Maybe he saw Beibi's impatience, and then asked: "The second question, Beibi, what did you write? Put the end? Are you sb?"
“…”
Beibi's mouth twitched, host, do we have any grudges? Are you sure you have to choose these weird questions?
Clap clap clap!
Uncle in the audience performed his duties diligently.
"Wow, this question is indeed a bit difficult to answer, so let's look down..."
Slightly smiled as he looked at the next question on his hand card.
Call~
Seeing Xiaodian's demeanor, Beibi secretly breathed a sigh of relief. It seemed that there was a normal problem.
"I'm very glad that you don't have many fans, Beibi, I only asked two questions, otherwise I wouldn't be able to come down to Taiwan."
I threw away the fan-question hand card, which only recorded two fan-questions.
Fuck! ! !
This broken show is definitely intentional. I think I am handsome, and I have thousands of book friends. When I learned that I was on the show, how could there be only two questions? It's definitely the show crew that is secretly doing things, and if I continue, my reputation will be completely ruined.
No, I have to go!
Beibi thought about it and stood up immediately.
Pfft!
With a little bit of eyes and a quick hand, I grabbed Shelly's arm again.
"Huh?"
Beibi glanced at it disdainfully. Even if the conditions of this kind of bad show are good, as a famous artist, I will not continue to stay. After all, I am also shameful.
A little bit and said in a low voice: "New book homepage strongly recommended!!"
Clap!
Beibi sat down again. Of course, he explained in advance that he didn't stay because of some default recommendation, but felt that there should be a beginning and an end in doing things, and he could not give up halfway.
"Very good, the show continues, Beibi, as a writer, I usually stay at home. If I am alone, I should be very lonely, so do you have a girlfriend?"
He stared at Beibi's expression with a dazzling gaze.
Oh, this question is so heartbreaking, how could a writer have a girlfriend? They are all a group of single dogs, and they usually do health exercises in addition to code words - a slow motion of the left hand and the right hand.
You can't answer frankly, otherwise it will be a joke if I'm so handsome and can't find a girlfriend.
I am also a person who wants a face!
How about an answer?
Well, I usually have dinner with my buddies, so let's replace my buddies with girlfriends and describe my dinner situation, perfect.
He thought to himself, and immediately replied: "Usually, my girlfriends and I often go out for dinner and drink, oh, don't you know, my girlfriends can drink, each person can drink a dozen bottles of beer, I can't do it at all, and they always like to eat bullwhip when they eat barbecue. They say something to make up for it. Oh, they must be doing too much health exercise on weekdays, so they are empty, so I say restraint, but they just don't believe it. ..."
He made a big talk, and when he was secretly complacent, he looked up and saw Xiao Dot's eyes were very deep, and there was a kind of bright light shining through everything.
Oh shit, isn't there a loophole in what you just said? Oops, let him see through it.
"You don't have a girlfriend, do you?"
The ground in the words from the little dot pierced his heart.
Pfft!
Beibi secretly spit out a mouthful of old blood and was heartbroken.
Shit, can you speak a little more tactfully, if I go on like this, I will be shameless?
No, I have to go!
He swoops to his feet.
Pfft!
With a little bit of eyes and a quick hand, I grabbed Shelly's arm again.
"What are you doing?"
Beibi glared angrily, no matter how good the conditions of this kind of bad show, as a famous artist, I will not continue to stay, after all, I am also shameful.
He said in a low voice, "The default decision is a big ban and push!!"
Clap!
Beibi sat down again. Of course, he explained in advance that he didn't stay because of some default recommendation, but felt that he couldn't forget his original intention as a human being. What was he doing on the show? Naturally, it is to interact more with the fans, so in order not to disappoint the fans, I must not leave.
"Okay, the show continues."
Qiao Dian glanced at the hand card and asked with a smile: "As we all know, there are four beautiful men in the online literature world. The top three are called Dongyan, Xier, and Nanzui. What is the fourth name? "
Aha, brain teasers, how could being a handsome and intelligent celebrity be so stumped by such a small problem?
Beibi thought to himself, Dongyan, Xier, Nanzui... Oh, I got it.
He smiled smugly, "North nose."
"I've never seen such a brazen person claiming to be a handsome man, bah, shameless, bah bah..."
He pointed at Beibi and complained frantically with a look of disgust.
What the hell? Am I guessing wrong? After the east eye, west ear, and south mouth, it really should be the north nose, huh? Wait a minute, Beibei? shellfish? It's a trap, it's a trap.
However, I am indeed a handsome man!
However, this is no longer the point at hand, but this penguin is too shameless. This interview is definitely premeditated, and it is to deceive me, a handsome and intelligent man.
No, I can't stay here for long, I have to go!
He swoops to his feet.
Pfft!
With a little bit of eyes and a quick hand, I grabbed Shelly's arm again.
"What are you doing?"
Beibi glared angrily, no matter how good the conditions of this kind of bad show, as a famous artist, I will not continue to stay, after all, I am also shameful.
He said in a low voice, "Recommended APP cover!!"
Clap!
Beibi sat down again. Of course, it was explained in advance that he didn't stay because of some default recommendation. After all, the recommendation was a cloud for him, and the fragrance of wine was not afraid of the deep alley. He can fire too.
The reason why he stayed was that his knees softened a little while ago, and he sat down again involuntarily, probably because of sitting for a long time, his legs were numb.
Since he sits down again, of course he can't stand up again, otherwise it will give a capricious impression, which is not very good.
"Okay, let's continue the show."
Qiaodian took another look at the hand card and asked: "As we all know, there are four rogue writers in the online literature world, and the last three are shameless, dirty, and obscene, then ask the number one rogue in the online literature world. Who is it?"
Another brain teaser? This question is of course trivial to me.
"Well, shameless, dirty, nasty... ah, I figured it out."
Beibi slammed the palm of his hand, and said in high spirits: "The number one gangster in the online literature world is despicable."
Clap! !
He applauded warmly and exclaimed: "Beibi, you finally admit that you are the number one rogue in the online literature world. Although your behavior makes me sick, your courage to face your own inferiority is worth it. I admire it."
Clap clap clap!
The uncle in the audience immediately played a round of applause when he saw the opportunity.
What, what the hell? How can I admit that I am the number one hooligan in the online literary world? Um, wait a minute, mean... shells? Damn, all the problems are traps, and they are tricked if they are not careful.
This penguin is too insidious, and this show is too sinister. If I continue, my image will be completely ruined, and my huge fan base will leave me.
No, I can't stay any longer, I have to go!
He swoops to his feet.
Pfft!
With a little bit of eyes and a quick hand, I grabbed Shelly's arm again.
"What are you doing?"
Beibi glared angrily, no matter how good this kind of bad show is, as a famous artist, I will not continue to stay, after all, I am also shameful.
He said in a low voice, "Omni-channel recommendation!!"
Clap!
Beibi sat down again. Of course, it was explained in advance that he didn't stay because of some omni-channel recommendation. After all, that thing was necessary for him who was determined to take the copyright route.
He is just passionate about his career and responsible for his business, and he doesn't want to walk away in frustration.
However, even if he stayed, he couldn't let a little bit of trouble get in the way, and he had to strike first.
He said with a smile: "Start small, can you ask some questions about writing? Don't get caught up in those little things that suck."
"Writing-related questions? Okay, no problem."
Qiaodian flipped through it, and immediately said: "Beibi, you are a famous writer, proficient in various writing skills, I will test your situational expression ability."
"Situational expression ability? Oh, what a trifle."
Beibi's mouth is slightly curved, confident and confident~IndoMTL.com~ Please ask! "
"One day, you were taking a shower, and suddenly there was an explosion in the kitchen, a chainsaw in the bedroom, and your sister's scream in the living room. At this time, your hair suddenly caught fire, and then There's a rocker playing guitar and he's breaking in with three singing dogs and they put out the fire on your head with a bottle of milk, what word would you use to sum up this episode."
Started to describe the problem in a quick tone.
“…”
Beibi's expression was sluggish, and he didn't understand what he was saying at all.
How should I answer this question?
Clap!
However, when he was confused, Qi Xiaodian had already taken the lead in applauding, admiring: "Beibi is indeed a famous writer. He used his own expression to perfectly express the scene I just had..."
Bang bang bang! !
A violent beating sounded from the stage.
"Kill you to death, let you ask a few questions, beat you to death..."
Beibi held up a chair and nodded frantically with a grim face.
Beep beep beep! !
Shortly after, the siren of a police car is heard outside.
"You elites, great gods, and platinum in the online literature world, when I come out, I will kill you all..."
Beibi clung to the steel bars on the police car and roared at the three young writers who were watching.
In the end, in view of Beibi's strong tendency to violence, in order to prevent threats to other people's lives, the judge decided to sentence Beibi to life imprisonment without going out of prison for life.
"Huh? Judge, I'm just a whimper, don't take it seriously, woohoo, let me out, I'm going to write a sideshow, I'm going to write a sequel, give me a chance, I want to be a good person... …”
"Woooo, Mom, I'll never write again in my next life."
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