Restricted Doomsday Syndrome Chapter 873: Guaihuajiang

I had a dream in the night of Valpus.

I'm in a dream right now.

The background of the dream is full of noise and noise, just like a rustling TV. An old film is shown before my eyes, and this film is about another story that happened to me. I am Gao Chuan. I don't know whether I am standing or lying down at this time. I can't see the existence of my body, but feel the confinement of my body to my soul. This imprisoned my body is like a rusty shackle. My soul can't control the movements of this body at all. It can't do anything except look and think.

I clearly remember that about a minute ago, I was still awake, but just a normal blink of an eye brought me to this dream. I have seen many dreams and hallucinations. In my life, the strongest time is dealing with abnormal things. The so-called abnormalities often exceed your expectations when you think they should be. I have been extremely keen on this kind of thing. The reason why I judged this to be a dream and not an illusion is not because of the difference between dreams and illusions, nor is there a too detailed definition of the two, just because-I think, Dreams are the best description of my current situation.

Although the picture is not very clear, I know clearly that the things in the dream are happening in another relatively normal world. And the person involved is another me, another Gao Chuan, the Gao Chuan who is supposed to be the real Gao Chuan, and he is just a tumor that resides in another person's personality.

I can’t describe the nature of my current existence, but calling myself a tumor doesn’t make me feel disgusted, because I think this is the most appropriate name. but. If I were to say that I was just another more real fantasy of mine-I had thought about it before-it was unacceptable, but I would not completely deny this possibility just because it was unacceptable.

However, as long as I am still active at my will. I am more inclined to see myself as an independent personality, rather than a "miraculous self-likeness."

Me and the other me, in my theory, are still one after all, but in order to maintain my own existence, I more often look at "he" from the perspective of a third party.

"Another", "He"-such titles. This is to draw a boundary between two things. If this boundary is lost, probably, one of me and the other self will disappear, or maybe, truly merge into one.

I know that unification is an inevitable process. Split is a morbid condition, however. Today, I still need this morbid state until there is a turning point.

I wander in the world of consciousness, unable to interfere with the seemingly materialized world, which is another me, another Gaochuan domain. And this dream is what happened to him.

Before this, I rarely had such an experience-looking at and thinking from the perspective of a third party. About the story of Sync happening around him.

In a certain workshop, in the vision of Gao Chuan, a beautiful woman walked.

The woman is wearing a scientific research white coat with her hands in her pockets. The outline of the lady's suit can be clearly seen in the lapel of the coat, and she is also wearing a crimson tie. This woman is very tall, nearly 1.8 meters tall, like a model, her figure looks very mature under the style of the tufted coat. From the perspective of temperament, it is clear that white is a kind of scientific research madman's feeling. The glasses with black frame cannot cover the sharp eyes like a scalpel behind the lens. These eyes can almost eclipse the rest of her face, although The outline of the facial features of this face is also a complete beauty, but her eyes are too dazzling.

Although the temperament is very different from the women I know, but in this unclear dream, the outline of her appearance and figure, and from this outline and the most eye-catching eyes, However, a certain essence of her is particularly revealed. And this essence, in my memory, is also particularly strong.

Jiang——

This woman looks a lot like "Jiang". However, when I think of this name, I vaguely feel that she is a little abnormal, not a specific "Jiang", not Zhenjiang, not Fujiang, not Zuojiang, not Youjiang, let alone a "virus". This woman is not part of a certain personality image in the "Jiang" system—I was not sure at the beginning, but intuition told me so.

This woman is not normal.

She has a certain quality that makes her existence very ambiguous. From my cognitive perspective, I have never thought that such ambiguous things actually exist in the doomsday illusion.

Yes, something. She is not a person, she is similar to "Jiang", but something. I don't know exactly how this kind of thing appeared, and what is the meaning of its existence. I am not very clear about the entire doomsday illusion system and the "hospital" project, but my experience of anomalies and the intuition arising from my own particularity are telling myself that this thing is not the nature of the doomsday illusion. Born.

I don't have any evidence, but that's how I feel it.

Yi Ti Gao Chuan calls her "Omi", and the name Omi is full of a strong sense of sight of "Jiang". Even so, it still can't erase the abnormal feeling in my heart. I don't know, what caused this dream? Is it because this Omi resonates with "Jiang"? Or maybe, Gao Chuan has arrived at a place where he can connect with the night of Valpus. I have no doubt that all these things I have seen can be seen by "Jiang". Therefore, another question arises. Can this Omi also be aware of the existence of "Jiang"?

Also, I thought--

The dream is over immediately.

My mind hasn't stopped jumping, but in the middle of it, I was interrupted like I was awakened. I opened my eyes suddenly, but I didn't see the sight of Valpus night. It was pitch black before my eyes, and I felt myself falling. I didn't wake up. It’s just that I fell from one dream to another, and this dream is clearer and more familiar than the previous dreams. This darkness is full of a strong breath of trembling and fear, and the feeling of falling is again So nostalgic.

Next moment. I seemed to have fallen into a lake, and there was still darkness around me. Even when I raised my hand, I couldn't see my fingers. However, the water slapped my body. The sound of splashing, soft and cold enveloping the skin, and the feeling of buoyancy dragging the body, is so realistic. This is an invisible lake.

I'm still sinking, this lake seems to be bottomless.

I want to turn around and move downstream. It is difficult for me to describe exactly what this place is. But I roughly understand what is here, what is lurking in the deepest part of this place. Probably, this is the "existence" composed of matter and consciousness, Gao Chuan, the deepest part of its essence, and the thing that lurks in the deepest part, no. It is more appropriate to say that it is a "monster", this monster. It is called "Jiang".

In the past, this dream was just a taste of it, and I have already realized what it means to be fear from instinct. I am very scared. Since the beginning of that kind of fear, it seems to have imprinted a deep outline in my soul. Even if it seems to be forgotten, as long as I return to this place, it will be exposed again, whipping my soul. This kind of pain is like a person with painful experience. The phantom pain when he returned to the place that caused him pain.

Phantom pain, phantom pain, by definition, does not completely correspond to the fear I feel at this time. However, I can only describe it this way, because, with a lack of vocabulary, I can no longer find a description of this strong regenerative fear.

However, I did not panic, because I have encountered this fear more than once, and I know more clearly the origin of this fear.

That is the monster named "Jiang", that is born with a corrosive presence.

I have been with it for a long, long time. Not material time, not physical time, but will and soul time.

Can’t say that these times have made me accustomed to this fear. Because this is the fear that I think I can never get used to. However, returning to the depths of this darkness again, surrounded by this sense of lake that seems to be condensed by fear, there is a feeling of nostalgia that is incompatible with fear.

Yes, a contradictory statement, but, I do, have a deep nostalgia for this fear.

I want to turn around, take the initiative to sink to the deepest part of this deep fear, go and see, the monster that brought me all this--"Jiang".

Until today, I have never really seen "Jiang". What I'm talking about is its most essential appearance. Just like the human shape and human structure, even in consciousness, there are inherent outlines, but in my heart, "Jiang" has always been just a concept, whether it is Zhenjiang, Fujiang or Zuojiang. Well, it's just a representation of it. It’s not that they are not real, but that they are just like standing at the foot of a mountain. From every side, you can only see the image of this side. It is also like a blind man touching an elephant. The incomplete "truth" that has been filled in my mind.

I want to see what the real "Jiang" is like.

I tried to rotate my body, but there was a kind of power that made me sway slightly from side to side with my back to the bottom of the lake. As long as I face upwards, no matter what action I do, it will be fine, but once the thought of turning around occurs, the power becomes very obvious.

"Jiang--!" I yelled. I didn't hear my own voice, this yelling only sounded in my heart.

Puff--

It is another sound that only comes from my heart, and I seem to be out of the water. In my mind, I sketched a picture like this—this dark, invisible lake, suspended in mid-air, fell from above and penetrated from below.

Falling, falling, falling-like a never-ending fall, weightless emptiness, strong fear, like cold water, instead of the hot blood flowing in the blood vessels, and finally condensed in the heart.

Puff--

I heard the sound of my heart beating.

I suddenly noticed that something not far away was falling with me in this darkness. I can't see that thing, but, I believe, there must be something.

Like... a human?

I opened my eyes, clearly opened my eyes, but I have a feeling of opening my eyes again, just like my eyes, there are two layers of eyelids, the inside is always open, and the outside, until it is opened Only then did I notice its existence.

The light filled my vision in an instant. The sudden light made my whole body get goose bumps. Then, I saw myself——in the deep glass-like sphere. The figure that I woke up in shock is mirrored there synchronously.

The sphere stretched farther, and I realized that it was a pair of pupils. A little further away, I finally saw clearly, that was Mae's face.

Mae sat on my waist. Before, he should be lying on my body and looking at me at close range. At this time, he was sitting upright slowly. Even so, I can still feel the creeping sensation from the vital points. We, I don't know when, are already closely integrated.

I panted, my head aching. That's cold. The feeling of fear and emptiness seemed to still be flowing in the blood vessels. Did Mae let me see what I saw? What is the significance of Omi's existence? I was thinking about this, but was interrupted by a surge of pleasure. The real river riding on me leaned back, like a fisherman pulling back. The hook was thrown up. Her long hair floats in the air like this. But I feel that my soul seems to be pulled out by her.

I still remember that before falling into the dream, the two of me were not doing this kind of thing, then. What happened when I fell into a dream? I don't know, the rationality I want to maintain is like a candlelight, teetering in a huge suction force. Mae. It seems to have changed back again, that night, Mae who dug out my eyeballs.

When she stopped, the deep darkness, eyes that seemed to swallow everything, confronted me again. That is, eyes that can't see any thoughts and emotions, as if all impurities are invisible. Just as my mind was able to breathe, there was a sharp pain in my chest.

My gaze couldn't help but turn away, only to see that Mae's hands on my chest were almost under the elbows.

My chest is pierced--

I felt her hand, moving in her chest, grabbed my heart, and then plunged deep into it.

There is a limit to the thickness of the human body, but Mae’s insertion seems to have no limit at all. She not only entered my body, but spread in my body. I can't see the scene in my body, but this feeling outlines the scene in my mind: Mae's hand is turning into something like mycelium, little by little, covering every cell , Every blood vessel, nerve and muscle, and every organ.

I can only describe it this way—she is entering me.

When I entered her body, she also entered my body.

We, more deeply, completely, intensively, and irresistibly than any combination of life, merge into one!

Mae’s arm has been completely submerged in my chest. Her sensual **** pressed tightly against me. She is sinking into my body.

This process made me feel immense pain, immense fear, and at the same time, there was also the same quality of pleasure. However, I still didn't yell, in my heart, as in the night when she went to my eyes that day, there was no idea of ​​resistance. I accepted all of this easily, because she was the same as that day, and she said to me:

——We will always be together, Achuan.

After she completely entered my body, a huge force, like an arrow, pierced the deepest part of the existence of "I".

I suddenly realized that this is a ritual, a signal.

It is both a return and a rejuvenation.

"Jiang", is about to wake up from my body.

Blood, I don't know when, has flowed a lot from the hole in my chest. I was lying in a pool of blood, the thick texture gently licking every inch of my skin. This blood, it seems that it will not stop, as if it has life, continuously, actively, and spreading in all directions. I suddenly felt that it was intended to cover the entire Valpus night.

There was footsteps in the distance, and I looked up.

The loss of blood and the hole in my chest make me feel that my life is dying. On the contrary, I feel that unprecedented power is pouring out from the deepest part of the essence.

I didn't get up, I was still lying in this corner, in this pool of blood, looking at people coming by.

It was a man in a wheelchair. He stared at me hardly~IndoMTL.com~No, in his pupils, the stronger image is that blood red. He seems to know that this piece of blood is not just blood. And among me, it's not just me.

His face is pale, his pupils are dizzy, and he looks a little lost. After a long while, he asked: "What did you do?"

Then asked the second sentence: "What are you?"

I know, that's not asking me.

I didn't speak, and he continued to stand in a stalemate, a thick pool of blood over his ankle, and he didn't even notice it. I realized that this wheelchair man was not aware of the danger here, but his fear and doubt were beyond this fear. All he wants is an answer.

I want this answer even at the cost of my own life. Fear, as if tightly wrapped around his soul, made it hard for him to breathe.

However, I did not say anything. My silence made him push the wheelchair madly, and he wanted to come up and grab my collar, completely ignoring the wound on my chest. He didn't care at all, I looked like a dying wounded. He was so excited, he had completely lost the grace he had always been. (To be continued...)